I am a former general in the Nigerian army who has managed to steal
countless millions from my people. It has come to my attention that you
are an investing genius and I would like your help establishing an
account at a U.S. bank.
To start with, you need to know that Lee Goldberg’s new mystery novel
MR. MONK GOES TO THE FIREHOUSE will be published on Jan. 3rd and is
getting a big promo push from The USA Network, which has posted
excerpts from his book and a dozen streaming video interviews with him
at their site:
This is important, because I need you to buy 17,800 copies of the book.
In return, if you give me your checking account number, your credit
card number, and your social security number, I will wire you $122,000
as "reimbursement" for the purchase of this splendid book. We will all
be winners, especially you my dear, dear friend.
I look forward to hearing from you.
General Rgo Zan
4 thoughts on “A Very Important Message”
Hell, thats only a few copies. I’ll have my accountant cut a check plus 10% for all the hard work. I have one request….all must be personally hand signed, with personalized inscriptions, to all my friends. I will attach the list (25 pages in 8 point type). I will need these with 3 days of reciept of the check. OK?
If not, see you in Thousand Oaks….
Dear General Rgo Zan,
I am presently waiting for the FBI to unfreeze my bank accounts and return the lap top they confiscated as part of their “Mr. Monk and the Nigerian Money Scam” investigation where perpetrators of anonymous money transfers mysteriously experience spontaneous combustion of reproductive appendages. However, I will surrender my checking account and credit card information provided you sign a release form holding me harmless for the capricious ignition of any such aforementioned appendages you may possess.
Meanwhile, Barnes and Noble is shipping me one book.
It’s not 17,800, but will one do? I’m obviously a diehard Goldberg groupie now, since I have already picked up my copy of MR. MONK at my local Barnes & Noble. I tried my local independent bookstore first, but they would have had to special order it, and I was too impatient. B&N had at least 10 copies, prominently displayed.
Okay, I’ll do it for you, just this once, but in return you have to have some scenes where Monk and Captain Stottlemeyer discover their true love for each other in the next book.