Another Opportunity for Vanity Press Suckers To Throw Away Their Money

The Telegraph is amused by Blurbings.com, another inept "service" aimed at hopelessly stupid people who've already been suckered by a vanity press and are eager to throw away even more money:

It had to happen sooner or later: an American company
is offering writers gobbets of praise with which to decorate the covers
of their self-published books. A plug from an unknown author is
unlikely to encourage anyone to buy a book by another unknown author,
but this has not stopped www.blurbings.com offering various packages that start at $19.95 for 10 micro-bouquets.

Victoria Strauss at Writers Beware also points out the stupidity of this new attempt to shake a few more bucks from the pockets of the dumb and unwary:

According to Blurbings' About Us
page: "Normally, a blurb will cost an author and/or publisher $14 –
$23, which includes printing of the galleys, packaging and mailing
fees. The standard 30 – 50 blurbs expected per book can range from $420
to $1,150. It is also very time consuming researching and contacting
prospective authors as well as conducting follow-ups during the
duration of the process."

Uh…okay.

[…]The whole point of a blurb is that the blurber be recognizable to the
general public, or else be someone whose credentials suggest that his
or her opinion is worth taking seriously. But how likely is it that
someone like that will find his or her way to Blurbings and happen upon
your digital galley? (And if you contact them yourself, what do you
need Blurbings for?) It's far more likely that the blurbs you'll get
will come from other site users–i.e., other self- or
small-press-published authors–or, possibly, from random web surfers.
No offense to Joe Micropress Author or Jane Random Web Surfer…but
blurbwise, who cares what they think?

Emily Maroutian, one of the owners of Blurbings.com, defended her "service" in a comment on Writer Beware:

Blurbings.com was not created for big industry authors or authors, like
yourself, who don't like blurbs. Blurbings was created to help
self-published authors and small presses receive blurbs for their work.
It was created to shorten the process and make it cheaper. […]If anyone here feels as if our service is pointless then don’t use it. It’s as simple as that.

I don't know why the Telegraph and Victoria are criticizing Blurbings.com. Everyone knows that a ringing endorsement from a complete nobody for a total unknown is better than no blurb at all. But I think I'm going to save $20 and just ask my gardener, the cashier at Ralph's, and the first person I see on the street to blurb my next book.

4 thoughts on “Another Opportunity for Vanity Press Suckers To Throw Away Their Money”

  1. Having dealt with a couple of people in the past year who consider POD makes them “published authors”, I wonder if those who use Blurbings.Com are actually naive and unwary, or consider it a legitimate avenue?
    “I have a book on Amazon!” Hey, that’s great, congratulations. Who is your publisher? “Oh, you order it, it gets printed, and sent to you in four weeks or so.” Ummm… that’s not how it works. “Sure it is.” Is it available in a bookstore? “What do you mean?” Can I walk into a Barnes and Noble and find it? “You can get through Amazon.” So, it’s not for sale retail. “Of course it’s retail, you idiot. I’m a published author!! Plus, some people have written in and said it’s terrific! So those comments will be on the new edition.” Reviewers? Publishers Weekly? “No, these are people whose job is to read everything and comment. I was lucky enough to have them LIKE mine!!!”
    That’s a reasonably accurate transcription of a conversation I had with someone about six months back. I can understand wanting to be published so badly that you’ll fall for anything. I did myself once, and the only excuse I can give is I was 18 at the time. 18 and stupid hopeful, but came to my senses before any money got involved….

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  2. LOL! I’ll blurb your next book for free. “Unpublished Author – who’s completed/an un-shopped novel sits in desk drawer – had this to say about Glodberg’s new book: This dude is fuckin’ funny – buy this joint RIGHT NOW!” See – no need to give the gardner 20 bucks 🙂

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