Transformers 2 is Hell, So Says Ebert

I love Roger Ebert's review of TRANSFORMERS 2.

"Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" is a horrible experience of unbearable length, briefly punctuated by three or four amusing moments. One of these involves a dog-like robot humping the leg of the heroine. Such are the meager joys. If you want to save yourself the ticket price, go into the kitchen, cue up a male choir singing the music of hell, and get a kid to start banging pots and pans together. Then close your eyes and use your imagination.

Not that I had any intention of seeing it anyway. I saw TRANSFORMERS 1…and that was enough.

9 thoughts on “Transformers 2 is Hell, So Says Ebert”

  1. I stopped listening to critics long ago. Tell me again how these “experts” earned the right to tell the rest of the world why movies or books or shows, etc., are any good? They can rarely agree with each other, so why do their opinions hold any weight?
    The only difference between listening to critics and listening to gossip at a cocktail party is that you at least get free drinks at the party. I have enjoyed several films that were panned by critics and hated films that critics adored.
    My NON-expert advice is that of you want feedback on anything, find friends who share similar tastes and get their input.

  2. BTW, that JD Salinger review link posted above by John McFetridge is for “Terminator Salvation”, not “Transformers 2”.

  3. Yeah, they’ve all kind of become the same to me, sorry about that.
    There was a time when film criticism was quite good. I’m tinking of Pauline Kael and her championing of new voices in the 70’s that might have been discounted too quickly without the kind of thoughtful discussions she started.
    I don’t know if that kind of criticism still goes on. I’m now aged out of the demograophic that most movies are for.

  4. “My NON-expert advice is that of you want feedback on anything, find friends who share similar tastes and get their input.”
    But why would you take their advice when you wouldn’t take any critic’s advice? If all criticism is meaningless, why listen to your friends either?
    My advice would be to find a critic who shares similar taste and see what s/he has to say. You won’t always agree, but you might learn something. It’s still just one person’s opinion, but if it’s a good critic, it should be a smart opinion.

  5. I’m still mourning the brain cells that likely died while I was watching the first TRANSFORMERS movie.
    (Well, the first live-action TRANSFORMERS movie. The 1986 animated TRANSFORMERS movie was actually kind of fun. And when I saw it, your uncle Burl and our cousin Anea were in the audience.)

  6. A good critic does more than opine. A good critic reveals enough to let you make up your own mind about whether or not to try something. I read reviews not for opinions, but to hear about things I might have otherwise missed, or learn more about things I have a mild interest in.

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