Month: May 2005

Searching for “Search”

by

I don’t what what it is, but Friday seems to be a big day for email. Here’s one I got today, which read, in part:

Television series air and are eventually canceled.  What
happens to them?  Obviously I wouldn’t be asking if I weren’t interested in
a particular series.

"Search," an adventure series that aired in
1972 lasted one season and has never aired since.   Do you
have general knowledge of what might of happened  to a series such as
Search?

Any information that you
might be able to provide that would assist  someone like myself in finding
out more about the disposition of the  series, or how to be able to maybe
have the opportunity to actually view  the episodes once more would be
invaluable.

The simple answer is that cancelled shows end up in a film vault somewhere. Unless the series had enough episodes to syndicate (which SEARCH didn’t), and there’s a real demand to see the reruns (which there isn’t), the show will just stay on the shelf forever.  There are literally thousands of series like that, and not all of them are one-or-two season flops. . There really is no opportunity for fans to get episodes, except bootlegs from collectors. There’s some room for hope…the success of TV show collections on DVD have given some obscure old shows new life. Whoever thought you’d be able to buy the complete DUSTY’S TRAIL (and who would want to?) Whether SEARCH will ever come out on DVD remains to be seen…but there are a lot of other, better known and more successful shows in the Warner Brothers vault that are likely to come out first.  I’m still waiting for SPENSER FOR HIRE…   

Lose Pounds the iUniverse Way

by

Today I received this email, which I’m assuming is in response to my post "iUniverse By The Numbers."

Is it bad writing that prevents a POD book from selling or many other factors? I challenge you: an established, tradional,  successful writer to submit something you wrote to a POD and when it doesn’t sell
will it be because of bad writing?

Additionally, everyone allows for the fact even a POD publisher is going to have 2-3 successful books per year. Well, when  you consider there are at least 100 POD outfits that means they are publishing  300 books per year that are worthy of being published. The problem is not with  the concept of POD.  The problem is there are too many PODs with limited ethical and quality standards. Imagine if there was one POD publisher that alone printed the previously mentioned 300 books.

I wonder a hundred years from now, will the reviewers of history look upon the likes of  Monk and Dick Van Dyke as highly as you view your works.
Furthermore, how many bad books gain success simply because of the stature of the author (Clinton,Fisher,Grisham) and the correct  marketing plan. Correctly done, a book with 200 completely blank  pages could become a top seller.

I think we both agree one of us is living in a Dream
World. We simply disagree on who it is.

Sincerely,
John S. Meade

I’m not sure why John is so angry with me. I guess the story told by the iUniverse stats was a very rude awakening for him.  Let’s tackle his points one by one:
 

Read more

iUniverse By The Numbers

by

Publishers Weekly posted a very revealing look at iUniverse in this week’s issue. It should be a real eye-opener for aspiring writers who actually believe they will sell any books by going the self-publishing route. Out of  18,000 books iUniverse published in 2004, only 83 titles sold at least 500 copies and a mere 14 showed up on the shelves of Barnes & Noble.  That’s the reality, folks.

2004
18,108: Total number of titles
published
14: Number of titles
sold through B&N’s bricks-and-mortar stores (nationally)
83: Number of titles that sold at least 500
copies
792,814: Number of copies
printed
32,445: Number of copies
sold of iUniverse’s top seller, If I Knew Then by Amy Fisher

2003
15,028: Total number of titles
published
7: Number of titles
sold through B&N’s bricks-and-mortar stores (nationally)
76: Number of titles that sold at least 500
copies
700,930: Number of copies
printed
10,186: Number of copies
sold of iUniverse’s top seller, The Sweater LetterbyDavid
Distel
$299: Cost of iUniverse’s
lowest-cost publishing package (includes one book)
$799: Cost of iUniverse’s most expensive
publishing package (includes 10 books)
$199: Cost of a basic press kit
$1,500: Cost of book publicity service, which
includes media pitches

Must Reading for Aspiring Authors

by

My brother Tod takes a hard look look at Writer’s Digest and its list of the 101 Best Websites for Writers. 

Any magazine which purports to be "for" writers,  yet accepts
advertising from scam agents and sleazy publishers and regularly
provides some of the worst advice imaginable for aspiring writers is
doing no one any favors.  Needless to say, their 101 websites
mirror their excellent quality control standards.

Tod checked out a few of the sites. His peek at the Long Ridge Writers Group is especially revealing…and hilarious.

The Fox Schedule

by

The fine folks at TVTracker are circulating the Fox schedules for both fall and midseason, too, when 24 and AMERICAN IDOL return to the air.  The new drama series include BONES (about a forensic anthropologist), THE GATE (about deviant criminals and the cops
who pursue them),  HEAD CASES (Chris O’Donnell as a mentally-disturbed lawyer) and PRISON BREAK ( a guy breaks into the prison he designed to help his falsely accused brother escape).

The complete schedules are on the jump.

Read more

Imagine if a Harlequin Romance Novel Could Vibrate, Too…

by

Susie Bright went to a Romance Writers convention and came back with this observation:

When a woman buys a traditional Romance, it’s like a hardcore porn fan
buying a XXX video. She wants her money shot. She does not want
distractions. She wants familiarity, to connect with "the childhood
masturbatory feeling," as my friend and offbeat Romanticist Pam Rosenthal
so perfectly described to me. I say this with utmost sympathy, but fans
would probably feel exposed by that description. Still, I believe
romances are stroke books— they are not so much read as used.

I wonder what she’d say about mysteries after going to a Bouchercon or Malice Domestic convention?

Obi-Wan Love Sandwich

by

Are your erotic fantasies filled with visions of  "an Obi
Wan/Amidala/Qui-Gon intergalactic love sandwich?" If so, then Fleshbot has found the STAR WARS slash for you at the Obi-Wan Torture Oasis.

"There is something so wonderfully demoralizing about sodomy;  takes all the fight out of a man, to be conquered from within." (from Zen & nancy’s "Little Earthquakes")

It’s more than a kink, it’s a biological imperative. We Ladies of Slash must hurt young Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Hurt him bad. Hence this site, and you know the rest. We’re not too inclined these days to wonder just *why* we enjoy Obi-Wan (or Mulder or Bashir or Blair or a host of other icons) displayed in such a visceral state. At least, we wonder no more so than men who question why they enjoy lesbian porn flicks. Just relax and enjoy the rollercoaster.

 

Your Great Idea for a TV Series

by

I got this email today…then again, it seems like I get it every day:

I have a great idea for a TV cop show but I’m not a writer. How can I sell it?

I can’t remember if I’ve posted this before, but here goes anyway. This is a column I wrote several years ago for Mystery Scene  about an experience I had with a woman who wanted me to sell her Really Great Idea For a TV Series. Parts of it will be familiar to those of you who’ve read my replies to this question before…

I was a guest at Sleuthfest in Florida a few years back and after one of my panels, a woman approached me saying she had a great idea for a television series. Even better, she already had 22
scripts written and a list of actors she felt were perfect for the parts.

All I had to do, she said, was sell it and we’d both be rich.

Read more