Current Affairs

Gorman on the Big Screen

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Variety reports that Ed Gorman’s novel THE POKER CLUB is finally coming to the screen.Tim McCann will direct from a script by Johnathon Schaech and
Richard Chizmar.

This tale of suburban violence focuses on four buddies who discover and
accidentally kill a burglar — who may not be alone — in the kitchen during
their weekly poker night. Their lives and the lives of their families are
forever changed by the difficult choices they must make. A January start date in Manitoba is
planned for "Poker."

Way to go Ed! I’m getting in line at the AMC right now.

You Can’t Cash Acclaim at the Bank

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Jennifer Weiner talks on her blog about the plight of author Mary Gaitskill, a widely acclaimed novelist and a National Book Award finalist. But acclaim, as the NY Times reports in their piece on Gaitskill, doesn’t always translate into money. Gaitskill barely scratches out a living and is deeply in debt.

"Her life is not easy," said Knight Landesman, Ms. Gaitskill’s friend and the
publisher of the magazine Artforum. "There have been good reviews, but that does
not translate into dough. She has not been offered the cushy faculty job at
Princeton. The work has been too raw, and that’s why this has been, really, such
wonderful news."

Gaitskill’s financial troubles were a shock to Weiner, a bestselling novelist herself who considers the author a major influence.

Gaitskill was one of the writers who made me believe that I could be a
writer, too, and her characters, while creepy, live and breathe on the page. If
she’s in debt and living in a doom room trying to write over the noise of
Britney Spears, there’s something wrong with the modern-day patronage system
that I always figured was working pretty well.

I recommend both Weiner’s post and the NY Times article to all aspiring writers — many of whom have unrealistic expectations about what they can expect once they are published.  Sadly, Gaitskill’s story is far more common than Weiner’s.

King Kong Tie-Ins

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Galleycat reports that Pocket Books is going ape for King Kong Tie-ins.

Anybody can put out a novelization for their blockbuster film, but Peter
Jackson had bigger plans for King Kong: He came up with a
backstory that’s been turned into an official prequel, King Kong: The
Island of the Skull [by Matthew Costello]. As Rod
Lott writes in Bookgasm, "Kong himself does not appear, not even in a
cameo. His name is whispered, his face is crudely drawn, but the ape never rears
his giant, ugly head." Still, Lott found it entertaining enough, and a cut above
the usual tie-in.

There will also be a novelization, by Christopher Golden, as well as two behind-the-scenes picture books (The Making of King Kong
and The World of King Kong), and sci-fi writer Karen Haber will be edit
Kong Unbound, "in which various writers will discuss "the history and
legacy of the most famous ape in Hollywood and his continuing impact on pop
culture and modern filmmakers."

Google Yourself At Your Own Risk

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Bestselling author Tess Gerritsen googled herself the other day and was stung by what she found.

Any writer who succumbs to the temptation of checking out what others are saying
about her books should be warned that what’s out there on the internet ain’t
always pretty. After eighteen books and twenty years in this business, I should
know better than to go searching for more reasons to drive myself crazy, but
what else is a masochist supposed to do in her spare time?

While you’re at it, stay away from Technorati and Blogpulse, too. Occasionally, I make the mistake of googling or blogpulsing myself and I’m always sorry I did. Do I really need to know all the different ways fanficcers and "Real People Slash" whackos would like me to fuck myself? No.

I also see a lot of outright lies and falsehoods — people accusing me of doing or saying something I never did or said. As infuriating as that is, I try to resist the strong temptation to refute every one of them (which would take hours, and draw me deeper into the cesspool, so I don’t bother).  It’s just not worth the time or effort.

But what attracts me to those Me Me Me searches, besides a raging ego, is that sometimes I will stumble on a positive review or an interesting discussion about my books, TV shows, or blog posts that I wouldn’t have discovered otherwise. Still, every time I type my name into one of those search engines I do so knowing I probably won’t like what I see…and vow never to do it again.

Until tomorrow.

Montgomery Simplifies

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David Montgomery reviews my brother Tod’s book SIMPLIFY on his site today. And he likes it.

Short story collections are nearly impossible to review, especially in
anything under several hundred words. (How do you comment generally on a book
that contains twelve different stories that vary in plot, theme, quality, etc.?)
Still, there are a few observations that one can make about Tod Goldberg’s
Simplify. The stories are sharp and insightful, many of them dealing
with issues emerging from childhood. The writing is often funny, even when it’s
painful, and always to the point, with keen dialogue and a strong voice.
Finally, the stories on the whole are powerful, provocative and a pleasure to
read. The title entry, in particular, is a minor masterpiece.

Reese Reckons

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The Book Standard reports that Reese Witherspoon will star in a movie adaptation of Jeff Long’s novel THE RECKONING.

The story centers on a photojournalist who arrives in Cambodia to cover the U.S.
military search for the remains of an American pilot shot down during the
Vietnam War.  Ted Tally (Red Dragon, The
Silence of the Lambs) penned the screenplay, which is out to directors.  Witherspoon will produce the project along with Type
A’s Jennifer Simpson.  Long’s
book was published by Atria in July 2004.

Teach Your 14-Year-Old How To Write Gay Fanfic Porn

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Skrike discovered a lengthy primer at Fanthropology on teaching 14-year-olds how to write better explicit gay fanfic.  Here’s some of their advice:

So how do you make a fourteen year old write better fan fiction? More important,
according to a fourteen year old acquaintance, how do you make your fourteen
year olds write better m/m slash?

Sex and intimacy, important components of slash and good slash. Another
component is fan fiction, m/m slash culture. The last component, and possibly
the most important one, is putting all of that stuff together.

Teaching
all this is not a simple thing. Remember, this age group isn’t always the most
receptive to valuing feedback in certain forms, isn’t necessarily writing to
learn about writing to become better writers. They write for fun, like feedback,
can and do use it to become better writers.

But hot damned, how do you teach a person to write in character? How do you
teach your teenage m/m slash fan to write in character in the context of a story
involving two guys going at it? There are two options that come immediately to
mind.

Sex and intimacy. Ouch and wow. My fourteen year old Good Charlotte slash
writing buddy’s answer to teaching her teen friends on how to write better
slash? Pop them all in front of a television, watch a little gay porn and they
should be set. My reaction to that as a twenty-five year old not interested in
gay porn was horror. There is this double edged sword here. Younger writers can
teach their own, to a certain degree, about the sexually explicit material and
how to write it using those examples. Adults teaching a fourteen year old how to
write erotic or pornographic sex scenes featuring two guys, citing pornography
and adult material, this might be a bit of an ethical nightmare and legal
liability.

The next thing to do is create general rec
lists of stories featuring m/m sex scenes. To cover your butt legally,
make sure the story ratings and contents are spelled out and don’t
explicitly label your rec list as “Read these teenage writers! Read
them and behold the writing of good m/m slashy sex scenes that will
make you wet! Yeah!” Try for something a bit more subdued and less
obvious. You get good examples out there and no one needs to be the
wiser that you have ulterior motives of teaching the teeny fangirls how
to become better m/m slash writers.

If it wasn’t for the good people at Fanthropology, imagine all the poor kids who wouldn’t have a clue how to write convincing fanfic sex scenes for Kirk and Spock, Harry and Ron,  and Willy Wonka and friends. Thank you, Fanthropology, for this important public service. I’m sure pedophiles everywhere appreciate it.

Maybe now professor Robin Reid will write an article for kids on how to write "Real Person Slash Fanfic." Wouldn’t that be nice?

The Dangers of using Boilerplate Text In Your Writing

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My friend author Twist Phelan pointed me to a NY Times article about comic Chris Elliott who, in researching his new comic novel  SHROUD OF THE THWACKER  on the web, inadvertently mistook an online spoof for genuine history and now has to share his royalties with the man he inadvertently stole from.

To his satirical 19th-century mix of gas-powered wooden cellphones and imagined New York landmarks like the original Ray’s Pizzeria, Mr. Elliott adds a minor but
intriguing character named Boilerplate, a robot said to be developed by the inventor Archibald Campion in the late 1800’s. According to a deliciously detailed Internet site that tracks the robot’s history (bigredhair.com), Boilerplate was designed to replace humans in combat; it took part in Roosevelt’s campaign at San Juan Hill, joined the hunt for Pancho Villa, and fought in and, ultimately, disappeared during World War I.

But in fact, Boilerplate never was. It is the creation of Paul Guinan, an illustratorBp and graphic novelist in Portland, Ore., who with his wife, Anina Bennett, is the author of "Heartbreakers Meet Boilerplate," published in July by IDW Publishing.

In the acknowledgments section of his book, Mr. Elliott says that Boilerplate came to
his attention thanks to research performed by his brother, Bob Elliott Jr. "You
can’t make up something like ‘Boilerplate,’ " Mr. Elliott writes. "Well you can,
but it’s a lot easier when your brother just shows you a picture of
it."

Soon, Mr. Elliott heard from friends of Mr. Guinan, who said that he was considering legal
action for the "fairly blatant and quite unauthorized" lifting of a copyrighted
character.

Elliott and Guinan reached an amicable financial settlement without having to bring in lawyers. This should be a cautionary tale for anybody who does their research on the Internet. Not everything that shows up in a Google search is fact.