Film and Television

The Power of “Yes”

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Craig Mazin at The Artful Writer offers this piece of advice to working screenwriters:

If you’re a professional screenwriter and you’re asked to make a change that you think is awful, say “Yes.”

Always say yes.

Destroy the main character? “Yes!” Change that brilliant ending that
brings everything full circle with a twist-and-a-half? “Sure!” If the
producer or director has an idea that’s just god-awful, death-dealing,
movie-wrecking, story-killing, your answer to the request should be a
charming and pleasant “Okay!” Say it with pride. Alacrity, even.

Why?  Because saying yes costs you nothing, and gains you much.

When I say “yes,” I’m not agreeing to be slavish.  I’m simply agreeing to try.
If I determine that their suggestion is not to be done, I can explain
why. When you remove that initial “no,” you remove 99% of the hostility
and disfunction from the writer-employer relationship while ceding 0%
of your authority and power. And it’s funny. Ever since I began saying
“yes” a few years back, two interesting things have come to pass.

I haven’t had to write anything I didn’t believe in…

…and no one’s fired me.

I don’t agree with this advice… and I’ve never been fired.  What I don’t do is say "No." What I might say is "That’s an interesting thought, but here’s what will happen to the story if I do it," or "I don’t think that’s a good idea, and here’s why," or "Let me think about it."  But I never say yes to a note I have no intention of doing. But that’s if I’m writing a TV movie or a feature or a pilot. 

On the other hand, if I am writing a freelance episode of a TV series, I might respond to a bad note by saying  "if I do that, here’s how it will impact the story," but I won’t press the point if the executive producer disagrees. I will always say "Yes." I will always do the note, gladly and with no argument, no matter what. Why? Because your job on a TV series is to do what the showrunner wants. It’s his  show, his  characters, not yours. You are a carpenter. You have come to do a job in his house.  Your job is to do what the customer wants to the very best of your ability.

The Real James Patterson

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Variety reports novelist James Patterson is developing a reality show with LMNO, the folks behind "Temptation Island." And no, it’s not going to be about a writer and his factory of scribes. The proposed series will focus on "the generation gap that exists within families."

"It could be about how a father and son look at things differently," said LMNO
prexyprexy-chief
exec Eric Schotz, explaining that one episode might take a parent and child and
have them both teach a sex-ed class.

Patterson said he decided to jump into the waters of reality TV because he
"had what I consider to be an irresistible idea. I couldn’t resist it, as much
as I tried."

He believes writing novels isn’t that far removed from
producing unscripted TV shows.  "When reality TV is done well, as it is in the case of ‘The Apprentice,’ you
can’t stop turning the pages," he said.

Computer Generated Romance

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I saw one of those computer-generated movies today. I don’t mean INCREDIBLES or SHARK TALES… I’m talking about HITCH, of course.  It’s the "romantic comedy" starring Wil Smith and Kevin James that may be the first movie written entirely by a computer. It  sticks to all the formula story elements and, of course, has the obligatory expository best friend, the effeminate gay friend, the father figure boss, and, the number one cliche of all, the romantic lead character who is either:

a)  a writer (novelist or journalist)
b) in publishing (books or magazines)
c) in advertising

Can’t screenwriters (or the software that churns out these bland romantic comedies) think of any other careers for their characters? It is possible for people to live in NY or LA and not be in one of those professions. But you wouldn’t know from these movies:

SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE (she’s a writer)
SOMEONE LIKE YOU (she’s a writer)
AMY’S ORGASM (she’s an author)
SOMETHING’S GOT TO GIVE (she’s a writer)
AS GOOD AS IT GETS (he’s a writer)
YOU”VE GOT MAIL (they are both booksellers)
NOTTING HILL (he owns a bookstore)
WE LOVE TROUBLE (they are both writers)
NEVER BEEN KISSED (she’s  a writer)
DOWN WITH LOVE (she’s a writer)
13 GOING ON 30 (she’s a magazine editor)
HOW TO LOSE A GUY IN TEN DAYS (they’re both writers)
BRIDGET JONES (she’s an editor)
BRIDGET JONES II (she’s a journalist)
ONE FINE DAY (he’s a writer)
KISSING JESSICA STEIN (she’s an editor)
ALEX AND EMMA (he’s a writer)

And those are just a few, off the top of my head. I’m willing to bet there are twice as many others that fit the same, tired mold (One or both lead characters are writers, in publishing, or in advertising). Come to think of it, it works like that in TV, too. Remember the spate of simultaneously airing romantic comedy sitcoms… SEX IN THE CITY, SUDDENLY SUSAN, JUST SHOOT ME, NAKED TRUTH… all about women journalists?

Hollywood writers have to get out in the world more…

And the software they are using to "write" romantic comedies needs serious tweaking. Then again, HITCH made $45 million last weekend, so what do I know?

Channel Flipping

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Some assorted TV news from the pages of Variety…

SciFi Channel is renewing BATTLESTAR GALACTICA for another season.

Battlestargalactica_1 The series has averaged more than 3 million total viewers in its Friday at 10 p.m.
timeslot. "Battlestar" has also ranked No. 1 among cable shows in adults 25-54
and men 25-54 for every week the show has been on the air.

"We all really felt there was something special about this show, that the
creators delivered on their promise to take a new approach to space opera. But
we honestly weren’t sure if the show was going to be embraced," said exec VP of
programming Mark
Stern . "The show is dark and gritty and sexy and, first and
foremost, a character drama. Yes, there is a lot of action, but it certainly
wasn’t the typical space opera our viewers expected. Thankfully, they get it and
they keep showing up in big numbers."

… no word yet from the honchos at the  Colonial Fan Force on how this will impact their important campaign to convince the Hollywood suits to do a big-screen version of the original show with the original cast.  Herb Jefferson and Laurette Sprange stand ready to clear their busy schedules to be in the movie.

MGM is desperately trying to raise DEAD LIKE ME from, well, the dead. Showtime cancelled the series,  which doesn’t have enough episodes to syndicate… meaning its worthless. So MGM is trying to strike a deal… somewhere, anywhere… to crank out new episodes so they have
enough to sell the series in reruns.

An MGM spokeswoman declined to comment, but 29 hourlong episodes for Showtime
(including the 75-minute pilot) are too small a number to make the reruns of any
series salable in basic cable or TV syndication. But if a network such as Sci Fi were willing to pony up a license fee to
bring "Dead" back from the beyond, MGM would do a package deal with that network
that would include the reruns.  Time is running out, however, because the options on the services of the
stars Mandy Patinkin and Ellen Muth are close to an expiration date.

The studio tried this some years back when CBS cancelled a new version of  THE TWILIGHT ZONE… MGM took the show up to Canada, churned out 22 episodes on the cheap, and hired Page Fletcher, the star of the erotic thriller anthology THE HITCHHIKER, to be their new Rod Serling.  Maybe they can get Herb Jefferson and Laurette Sprang for DEAD LIKE ME.

MissinglogoopLifetime has cancelled WILD CARD and it looks likely that they will renew MISSING for a third season, which could be good news for yours truly (I have been a writer/producer on the show for two seasons).

Blogging Hell

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Twice today I have tried to publish a post on this blog about the TV development season and the pilots the networks are considering.

This morning, I wrote a long, detailed article full of brilliant observations, interesting TV pilot trivia, and stunningly insightful commentary on the Industry (if I do say so myself)… and through an idiotic computer mishap, lost it all.

I nearly stuck my fist through my computer monitor.  Clicked off and busied myself with other things.

So I sat down tonight and attempted to resurrect the article from memory and, although it wasn’t half as good as the earlier version, I was happy with it… and I was nearly done, about to insert another link and… clicked the wrong window to close,  and lost that !@#$%^  article, too.

So the hell with it. 

I probably shouldn’t have been writing about pilots anyway. I might need a job on one of the shows I was criticizing…

The TV Writers Social Contract

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What is it, exactly?

The folks at TVGasm believe it’s this:

We watch their shows and make them
rich. In return, they promise to work hard and prevent that show from
sucking.

But my writing/producing partner William Rabkin is confused.

I thought our social contract with the viewer required us to write
whatever storylines the "real" fans demand… to slavishly adhere to
the "rules" they set down in their fanzines… and to realize that
their fanfic is infinitely better than our produced work, because we’re
just doing it for money and they’re doing it for love. How many damn social contracts do we have with our fans?

So which is it? Hurry up and tell me, okay? Because I need to know before we start writing/producing another TV show.

Straight Guys Don’t Watch Queer As Folk…

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…but they’ll watch THE L WORD.  Gee, I wonder why. The show’s creator Ilene Chaiken, in an interview in the NY Times this weekend, makes passing mention about how popular her show is with straight guys who fast-forward pass the yak-yak-yak and the whine-whine-whine to the hot girl-girl action.

LwordBut if everyone agrees that the sex looks good, some have objected
that it looks, well, too good. With classically beautiful actresses
like Jennifer Beals, Pam Grier and Mia Kirschner, Ms. Chaiken
diplomatically said, "There are those viewers who perhaps rightly take
issue with the attractiveness of the cast."

The underlying
accusation is that she is playing to men, a charge she says she finds
mildly annoying since she is, after all, creating a show about sexy
young women in Los Angeles, not a documentary about asthmatic mill
workers in Pittsburgh.

I suspect most guys would watch female asthmatic mill workers getting it on…  if they all looked as good as Jennifer Beals. What’s wrong with playing to men, too? Ratings are ratings.  Of course, Chaikin’s comments imply that lesbians aren’t interested in watching attractive women having sex.  I suspect lesbians would watch female asthmatic mill workers going at it, too, if  Halle Berry was one of them.

(Shockingly, the wide-ranging discussion didn’t make any mention of the strident demands made by the "Save Karina Lombard" campaign  last June.  Could it be because nobody is going to miss her?)

Bad Agents

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A friend of mine told me an agent horror story today. A few years ago, his publisher accidentally sent him, instead of his agent, royalty statements on his book. The royalties showed that he’d earned $350,000… but his agent had sent him a false statement that said he’d earned only $11,000. My friend sued his agent, the case dragged on for years, and (for reasons I don’t understand) the parties involved ended up settling for about ten percent of what he was owed.

This story reminded me of a couple of other recent agent scandals. This one was covered by the Sacramento Business-Journal:

Celebrated local chef Biba Caggiano writes cookbooks, yet her
relationship with her literary agent has turned into the stuff of
detective novels.Caggiano is seeking more than $400,000 and alleges that Los
Angeles-based Maureen Lasher Agency kept two advances that were
supposed to go to her.  The suit says the agent
even attempted to pass off an incomplete Italian recipe book, written
by someone else, as Caggiano’s work.

Caggiano — who owns Biba restaurant
in midtown Sacramento and once had a cooking show on cable’s The
Learning Channel — learned of the advances only when her publisher
contacted her in July about two books for which it had paid advances of
$106,250 and $143,750, the suit says. It was, Caggiano alleges, the
first she heard about the advances or the negotiations for two new
cookbooks.

Advances and book royalties go to the agent and are then disbursed,
along with financial records, to the author. Caggiano says she hasn’t
received any checks or any accounting from her agent. The suit says the
amount owed Caggiano exceeds $400,000.

A spokeswoman for publishing house Harper Collins said that the
company couldn’t comment about the issue and that it is a matter
between Caggiano and her literary agent. In addition to Caggiano, New
York-based Harper Collins has a stable of best-selling cookbook
authors, including Julia Child, Emeril Lagasse and Marcella Hazan.

In October of 2000, unbeknown to Caggiano, Harper Collins delivered
$106,250 as an advance for a cookbook; Caggiano was not paid any part
of the advance nor was she made aware of its existence, according to
the suit. A second advance of $143,750 was paid by the publishing house
for a second book, and again, Caggiano says, she was not paid any of
the advance or made aware of it.

Then, the suit states, Lasher "attempted to deliver to Harper
Collins an incomplete and unauthorized manuscript" without Caggiano’s
knowledge or consent.

The agent hasn’t responded to calls or letters about the incidents,
the suit states. The suit seeks an accounting of Lasher’s books,
records, receipts and disbursements.

This was no fly-by-night agent, either.
Lasher’s clients included Barry Manilow.  Another well-known case of agent fraud involved Marcie Wright who, at one time, represented DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES creator Marc Cherry as well as many other top screenwriters and writer/producers.

According to Variety, she told screenwriter Robert Kuhn that Castle Rock never paid him for a rewrite he did on a script, and that DreamWorks wasn’t going to pay him for a  "quick  polish" on another screenplay he’d written.  The truth was that Castle Rock paid him $150,000  for the rewrite and DreamWorks  kicked in $87,000 for the polish.

Kuhn wasn’t the only client she was robbing. Her client Marc Cherry made a $100,000 pilot script deal with Paramount Network Television in 2001 that was later tabled.

Wright allegedly went to studio and said Cherry wanted to
settle out of the deal and walk away rather than pick it up at a later
date. The studio agreed and cut a check for $25,000, made out to "Marc
Cherry, c/o the Wright Concept," that never made it to Cherry.

Wright was arrested on grand theft and fraud charges and  ultimately pled no contest to embezzlement,  agreed to pay some $270,000 in restitution to her clients,
and serve 12 months in county jail.  The amount ballooned to nearly $500,000 with interest and legal fees. She paid the restitution and was released in September after serving 160 days in prison. She is on three years probation. According to media reports, Wright  is forbidden
from holding a personal checking account,  may not act in any fiduciary
capacity, and is currently  "undergoing psychological treatment."

TV Stars Nab Oscars Noms

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Who could  ever have imagined that Thomas Haden Church would be nominated for an Academy Award… a man whose last major film role was in "George of the Jungle II?"

In his LA Times interview, Church says:

Though he definitely considers "Sideways" a career comeback [Note: That’s an understatement], Church is getting a
little tired of the mythology that seems to have grown up around his casting —
that he was as big a has-been as his character [Note:  He was].

"I’m very flattered by
all the attention," he says, "but there is this tone among some journalists that
Alexander had to pry the lid from my coffin. It wasn’t quite like that. I hadn’t
done anything high-profile in a few years, but … I had 11 years starring in
television."

Church came to the public’s attention in 1990 as oblivious
Lowell Mather during the five-year run of "Wings." Then he starred for two years
with Debra Messing in "Ned and Stacey." His switch to film could be described as
"challenging." He worked steadily — starring as Jane’s sleazy fiancé in "George
of the Jungle" and its sequel — but often in films that never found a
distributor.

Crystal Bernard should start shopping for an Oscar dress… it could be her turn in a few years. Joking and astonishment aside,  Church was truly wonderful in "Sideways" and I’m glad to see him getting the nomination…

Actually, the entire Best Supporting Actor category was filled with TV Actors … Alan Alda (M*A*S*H), Jamie Foxx ("Roc," "The Jamie Foxx Show," etc.), Clive Owen ("Second Sight," "Sharman,"  "Chancer") and Morgan Freeman ("The Electric Company").

Granted, Morgan Freeman is stretching it… he has been a movie star for many years now but still, it’s pretty incredible how many of those actors spent years in the series television grind. 

This Oscar nom could do for Church what it did for James Cromwell and Martin Landau, two other actors who were slogging around in TV before their surprise nominations. Cromwell’s immediate credits before  "Babe" included guest-shots on "Matlock" and "Diagnosis Murder" and a short run as a regular on "The Last Precinct." Martin Landau joined "Tucker" after his Emmy-ignored performances in "Harlem Globetrotters on Gilligan’s Island" and "Return of the Six Million Dollar Man and the Bionic Woman." After that, Cromwell and Landau because movie stars… it would have been inconceivable to imagine Landau starring in a Woody Allen film before "Tucker" revived his career.

On a different topic, I was disappointed by the Best Original Score nominations… do we really need to nominate John Williams again…and for the third rehash of a score (Harry Potter) that he’s been nominated for (and perhaps won, I can’t recall) before? I would like to have seen Edward Shearmur’s wonderful "Sky Captain" score nominated… along with Michael Giacchino’s wildly inventive and invigorating "Incredibles" score (which may have been snubbed because it emulated so many of John Barry’s Bond cues).