Lee Goldberg

The Mail I Get

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I got an email today asking me about the 1988 ABC TV series MURPHY’S LAW, which starred George Segal as an insurance investigator and Maggie Han as his much-younger girlfriend. The email said, in part:

“I am a big fan of Murphy’s Law, and I am not sure anyone else can answer my question! What happened in the unaired episode? (I believe it was called “All’s Wrong That Ends Wrong”.) And while I have you, were there plans for where the series would
go, had it continued? […] Did you enjoy the series? What was it like working for Michael Gleason and Leonard Stern? There is so little written about the show, I would love to know any of your recollections.”

The series was based on the TRACE and DIGGER novels by Warren Murphy. Michael Gleason, the creator and showrunner of REMINGTON STEELE, was the executive producer and Ernie Wallengren was the supervising producer. Each episode was titled after one of the Murphy’s Laws from the books published by Price Stern & Sloan (a company co-founded by Leonard Stern, one of our producers).

Gleason protege Lee David Zlotoff (who created MacGYVER) wrote and produced the 90-minute pilot which, as I recall, neither ABC nor New World Pictures Television was too happy with. So they brought in Michael, who re-cut it, shot some new scenes, and dropped the melancholy Mike Post theme in favor of a song by Al Jarreau. The idea was to make the show more light-hearted, though there definitely were some on-going dramatic elements regarding Murphy’s battle with alcoholism and his efforts to win visitation rights with his young daughter from his estranged wife, played by Kim Lankford.

I have enormous affection for MURPHY’S LAW because working on it had a lasting impact on me personally and professionally. It was the first staff job that Bill Rabkin and I had ever had…and it came right after the longest writers strike in the history of the TV industry. We wanted the job so bad and it was astonishing to us that we actually got it.We were working on the CBS/Radford lot and sharing a floor with the staff of THIRTYSOMETHING, which was pretty cool, too.

I was a huge admirer of Michael Gleason’s and, frankly, couldn’t believe we were actually working for him. He was so charming, creative, funny and friendly…he couldn’t have made it easier or more exciting for us… but even so, I was intimidated to actually have achieved my dream, and so afraid of failing, that for the first day or two after we got the green-light to write our script I suffered complete writer’s block, which broke only because Bill was there to walk me through it. We wrote two scenes together, line by line, and it was so much fun that I got so caught up in the writing that I forgot to be afraid.

I could go on and on about the show but the best thing about it was that Michael Gleason and Ernie Wallengren were wonderful writers and producers and very nice people. They taught us everything they knew, let us into casting, editing, music spotting and every other aspect of production…and gave us far more responsibility than we had any right to have. They also became more than our bosses…they became very close friends who we would work with again and again over the years. Series regular Kim Lankford introduced her cousin Carrie (or was it her niece?) to Bill, who promptly fell in love and married her…and they are still together today.

To answer your specific questions…we worked closely with Michael Gleason and consider him our mentor. We owe our careers to him and Ernie. We met Leonard Stern many times, but he wasn’t actively involved in the writing or producing of the series.

By the time we shot the 13th episode, we knew we’d been canceled and were going through the motions. The final episode, at New World’s insistence, was designed as a spin-off starring Joan Severance as a thief-turned-insurance investigator. Two versions were cut — one as a MURPHY’S LAW episode, the other as a pilot that largely cut our cast out of the action. I don’t know who had the brilliant idea of trying to sell a spin-off from a canceled show but, needless to say, it went nowhere. At the end of the episode, Murphy wins his long battle for unsupervised visitation rights with his daughter and the final shot is the two of them embracing on an airport runway.  The episode never aired…but I have a copy.

As far as I know, the show has never been in syndication and the only episode ever released to home video was the pilot…

Here’s the main title sequence…

Mr. Monk and the Great Review

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Author Bill Crider reviews MR. MONK AND THE TWO ASSISTANTS on his blog today. He says, in part:

As I’ve said before (here and here), I’ve never seen an episode of Monk. Yet I have a great time reading Lee Goldberg’s novels based on the series (and I’m not even reading them in the order of their publication).
I don’t think a book in this series will ever get an Edgar nomination. Why? Maybe it’s greatest drawback is that it’s a tie-in. Tie-ins don’t get a lot of respect. Too bad, because people who don’t read them often miss a real treat. Also, there’s not a lot of heavy-duty angst.

The lack of recognition for tie-in books is why Max Allan Collins and I established the International Association of Media Tie-in Writers (aka IAMTW or I Am a Tie-in Writer) to raise awareness of tie-in books and their writers. The organization is now three years old and boasts over 100 members. We also established the Scribe Awards, honoring excellence in tie-in writing.

One of the beefs with the Edgars is that the judges seem partial to angst-ridden, hardboiled novels and neglect thrillers and light-hearted fare. I don’t know if that’s true or not, but I can understand why that perception persists — I don’t think that a “comedy” has ever won the Best Novel Edgar. That said, Gregory MacDonald won for “Best First Novel” for FLETCH in 1975 and Sharyn McCrumb won “Best Paperback Original” for BIMBOS OF THE DEATH SUN in 1988.  

The Monk books may never merit an Edgar nomination, but TWO ASSISTANTS did win the Scribe Award last year from the IAMTW for “Best Original Novel” in the General Fiction category and I am very proud of that.

Making My Dreams Come True

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Every time I do a signing with Steve Cannell, it's reliving a dream. I grew up admiring him and his writing on shows like THE ROCKFORD FILES and THE A-TEAM…and I dreamed of working for him someday. He had the career that I wanted…and the talent, too. I didn't think that working with him was a real possibility but I knew I could learn from him anyway. 

While I was in high school, I covered the television business for The Contra Costa Times (in Walnut Creek, CA) and came up with lots of excuses to do phone interviews with him, never once revealing that I was only 16-years-old or that I had any desire to be a TV writer. I know he liked the articles that I wrote because he told me so…and, more importantly, he never failed to return a call and was always available for a quote if I needed one.

I was still freelancing for the newspaper…and for a number of other publications…when I went down to Los Angeles to attend UCLA. I called him for an article about TENSPEED AND BROWNSHOE (or was it GREATEST AMERICAN HERO?) and I must have mentioned that I'd moved to L.A. because he invited me to his office at Samuel Goldwyn Studios. I was terrified. I was sure that once he saw I was a kid, he'd think I was a fraud and never talk to me again. But I couldn't resist the opportunity to actually meet him.

He did look shocked when I walked in the door, and I think for a moment he was afraid I was going to pitch him for a script, but I started off with a tough question about his decision to go into business for himself and the interview went great after that. Whatever awkwardness either one of us felt quickly evaporated and we talked for a couple of hours.  (I know now, after talking with him about that day, that I proved to him with that question that I was a serious journalist and not someone who'd been running a long scam to get into his office). It was a wide-ranging interview about the business, about the risks he was taking leaving Universal, and it was one of the best interviews I'd ever done. In fact, it was one of the clips that got me a job as a reporter for Newsweek. 

I interviewed him many more times over the years for various articles for a bunch of publications (the best was a huge profile in the trade magazine Electronic Media, now know as Television Week). I eventually gave up reporting and, through a lucky break, become a TV writer with William Rabkin. We sold a few freelance scripts and then got offered our first staff job… on HUNTER, a Stephen J. Cannell Production. It was fate.

Unfortunately, by that point, Steve had a  "hands off" relationship with the show, which was then being run by Fred Dryer and Marv Kupfer. Even so, I'll never forget the fantastic feeling the first day I walked into the Stephen J. Cannell productions building as one of the writers instead of a reporter.  It was amazing.  A day or two later, I ran into Steve in the hallway.  He thought I was there for an interview and he started to apologize for forgotting the appointment…I was thrilled to tell him that no, I wasn't there for an interview…I was working for him.  He smile and gave me a hug. 

Sadly, because of the situation at HUNTER, I didn't actually work with Steve at all…I only bumped into him now and then. The job also didn't last long …. we ended up quitting and getting hired onto BAYWATCH…but that's another story. 

The HUNTER experience didn't tarnish my relationship with Steve at all. We saw each other at industry events and he was always amazingly friendly. And as it turned out, a few years later I was back at Cannell again as a supervising producer on the syndicated series COBRA and, much to my pleasure, I actually got to work closely with him this time.  He also used to pop into my office to share bits and pieces of a novel he was working on….which became THE PLAN.

We've remained friends ever since  – and have signed together and spoken on panels with each other many times in many cities over the years. (Bill & I even had the amazing thrill of hiring him as an actor in a script we wrote for DIAGNOSIS MURDER…he played a burned-out TV producer of action shows…who becomes an actor!). But every time we get together, I am reminded how lucky I am to have  achieved one of my dreams and to be able to count Steve among my friends. I hope the thrill never dies. 

What brings all of this to mind? I'll be signing and talking TV writing with Steve Cannell…and with Bill Rabkin…on January 24th. The info is below.

Saturday, January 24 at 3:00 p.m.
HOORAY FOR HOLLYWOOD!
STEPHEN J. CANNELL, LEE GOLDBERG and WILLIAM RABKIN discuss and sign their books
It's an all-star event at The Mystery Bookstore, as we welcome not one but three writers who have made their marks as TV screenwriters as well as novelists. 
 
Stephen J. Cannell, creator of "The A Team" among other shows, will discuss and sign ON THE GRIND (St. Martin's, $25.95), his ninth Shane Scully adventure; as the book begins, Scully is not only fired from the LAPD, but also kicked out by his wife.  The reason for both is a movie actress, Tiffany Roberts, who'd been looking for a hit man to kill her husband.  As Scully starts a new job with Haven Park, the most corrupt police department in California, we learn more about his connection to Tiffany Roberts.
 
Veteran screenwriter Lee Goldberg will discuss and sign his seventh Monk novel, MR. MONK IS MISERABLE (NAL hardcover, $21.95), based on the award-winning TV series.  Everyone's favorite obsessive-compulsive detective lands in Paris, which is bad enough, but then winds up in a sewer museum – where he finds a fresh skull.
 
Goldberg's longtime writing partner, William Rabkin, will discuss and sign PSYCH: The Mind is a Terrible Thing to Read (Signet paperback original, $6.99), the first novel based on the hit USA Network series.  Phony psychic/real detective Shawn Spencer agrees to lend his psychic powers to his old high school rival, Dallas Steele; Dallas wants Shawn to pick some investments for him.  The investments turn out to be busts, but when Dallas winds up murdered, Shawn's detective talents are essential.
 
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The Mail I Get

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I got this email today from Patrice Schoppe, a displeased MONK reader:

I just read Mr. Monk in Outer Space. Please leave the social commentary
about rich vs. poor to those who are good at it. Do what you do well and write
Monk books about Monk. If you want to write social commentary, do it in a non
fiction book.

I replied:

Ouch!
I'm not aware of any "social commentary" in my MONK books…but now that I have been forewarned, I will be sure to save any future thoughts along those lines for my non-fiction blockbuster on the changing face of American society: "I Saw a Rolls Royce in the Walmart Parking Lot"

He replied:

Hmm. . . . now I know where Monk's personality and ego come from.

Light Goes out at Light Sword

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73537Victoria Strauss at Writers Beware is reporting the long-expected news that sham publisher Light Sword, which defrauded authors and was run by the talentless Linda Daly (pictured on the left) and the convicted felon Bonny Kirby, has filed for bankruptcy. Daly has also filed for bankruptcy, but it may be a lame move to keep her sham publishing operation going:

Daly's personal bankruptcy petition, which Writer Beware has seen, makes no mention of her interest in LSP Digital, or of the contracts in her/the company's possession. Also, while the bankruptcy petition for Light Sword Publishing (which Writer Beware has also seen) claims that Light Sword has had no income for the previous 12 months, LSP Digital was only incorporated last June. So what happened between December 2007 and June 2008, when Light Sword was still Light Sword, and was still publishing and selling the books that are now with LSP Digital?

Is Daly hoping that she can solve her personal and corporate credit problems by declaring one publisher bankrupt while continuing to operate the other? I can't help but be reminded of literary scammer Martha Ivery, who declared bankruptcy for her vanity press Press-Tige Publishing, but attempted to shield Press-Tige's assets by transferring them to a "new" publishing company called New Millennium. The bankruptcy trustee in her case wasn't fooled.

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Let's hope the same is true with the trustee in the Light Sword case. But it won't be too hard for him to see the truth. Daly is so inept that the web address for LSP Digital is Lightswordpublishing.com.

Bonny Kirby, Daly's publishing partner, is also the advertising director at Affaire De Coeur Magazine, which heaped glowing praise and cover stories on Light Sword …without any reference to her personal and financial connection to the sham publisher. These ethical lapses are exactly what you'd expect from a woman who is currently on probation for writing bad checks and third-degree felony theft.

I hope the fall of yet another POD scam will teach aspiring authors to be more careful about who they get into business with.

Chance Meetings

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I can't go to Costco without running into family, friends, neighbors or people I've worked with. It's like our town center. Today I ran into my brother-in-law and my niece, one of my neighbors, and actor Jeffrey Combs, who I worked with on MARTIAL LAW (and who I bumped into last year at customs at LAX coming back from Europe). We chatted together at my Costco power table and ate our power hot dogs. We discussed the possible SAG strike, the pluses and minuses of working overseas, and the how the TV biz is changing. He's a very nice guy — it's a shame that he's always playing villains. So my quick errand to Costco turned into a two hour trip, but that's okay. I love chance encounters like that. Now I'm sitting in the parking lot at Petco while my wife and daughter look for a sweater for our dog… 

Mysterical-E is Tied In

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Gerald So's column at Mysterical-E today is an appreciation of media tie-ins. He writes, in part:

A common misconception is that tie-ins are poorly or quickly
written, and while some have seemed that way to me, as my reading
tastes have matured, I've been able to choose better-written material.
What makes me personally pick up a tie-in novel or comic book these
days? The author has to have some experience writing for the original
medium and the new one, as Monk novelist Lee Goldberg has with USA
Network's Monk. Because Goldberg has written for the show, and because
he is a novelist in his own right, he's well suited to bring Monk to
the page.

[…]In
some ways, tie-in writing is more difficult than creating characters
and a story from scratch. Tie-in writers have to deliver the best of
both worlds: what the existing fan base enjoys about the original
concept and what the new fan base expects from the new concept. For
example, Tod Goldberg's first tie-in, Burn Notice: The Fix
delivered the wry spycraft from the TV show but also delivered an
intricate plot better suited to a novel than to TV's usual 44 minutes.

Thanks, Gerald!

The Mail I Get

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I got an email from a self-published author. Here it is, in its entirety (minus his name):

Hello,
Thank you so much for your time and I hope today finds you well. I write today to present 2 works…one fiction, one non-fiction which I am hopeful you may wish to review. Descriptions of both are below as well as links to read the first chapter of each. In the case of the non-fiction work a current press release (with review excerpts) is also below. Looking very forward to hearing from you. 

Wow, what a compelling pitch. Does he really think that would entice anyone to review his work? Well, to be fair, it did entice me to read the descriptions that he included. Here's the one for his non-fiction book (minus the author's name and book title):

An often terrifying journey through XYZ’s childhood in a “haunted” house through to many strange and unexplainable supernatural contacts and occurrences in his later life. Then the twist. A complete second book is added that the author feels was actually sent from an otherworldly source. Multiple cases of connections to the US 9-11 events, even mentions of the flight numbers and a description of the feelings of the World on that day are to be found in this second book. Eerily it was written and copyrighted 4 years prior to the events. XYZ feels his work was “spiritually sent through me to serve as a guide to help bring peace of mind to us all in the post 9-11 World”. 

Gosh, I wonder why he had to self-publish this one. Here's how the author describes himself on his website:

XYZ is many things. Author, award-winning Poet,popular paranormal Blogger, explorer of the strange and unusual, a guiding hand, a creator and developer, and more.

The "and more" should include nutball and sucker. By the way, I feel this entire post was sent to me spiritually from an otherworldly source.

I’m a Woman…and a Publisher?

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Bonnie Kaye's Jones Harvest Fraud Victims site and Jones Harvest Fraud Victims Blog must be doing some good because she's certainly rattled Brien Jones, the founder of the sleazy vanity press. 

Brien, you may recall, is a former top exec at the Bookman and Airleaf vanity presses, which defrauded scores of gullible, aspiring authors out of hundreds of thousands of dollars before they were shut down. Today he's posted a new rant on his Jones Harvest blog defending himself against Kaye and the legions of bloggers who are warning people to stay away from his latest vanity press scheme, which seems to prey primarily on the elderly:

I also understand cowardly women like Victoria Strauss, Julie Neidlinger and Lee Goldberg and their lies. After all they’re not saying anything bad — just repeating what they were told. And what do you know! They all have their own publishing companies too! 

As far as I know, I am neither a woman nor a publisher. But you can't really expect a guy with Brien's shady vanity press past to concern himself with facts. It's clear that the only fact he is interested in is whether or not his elderly clients have any credit left on their Visa cards that they can spend on his false promises of publishing success. 

I have blogged about Brien and his vanity press scams here for years…not based so much on what other people have said, but on the sleazy solicitations the moron has actually sent to me and the outrageous promises he's made on his websites.

Kaye's efforts brought down Airleaf and exposed their rampant fraud … with luck,  she will accomplish the same with Jones Harvest.  Keep up the good work, Bonnie!

UPDATE 12-31-08: Brien Jones has, apparently, sobered up and removed his rant from his blog. But you can still see it here on his BonnieKayLies blog. I've also saved it here  as service for students studying to be mental health professionals. 

 UPDATE 12-29-08: Flights of Fancy blogs nails Brien Jones for their amateurish covers and using his receptionist to write the rave reviews that are used as blurbs on his customers books.

UPDATE 12-28-08: Victoria Strauss at Writers Beware discusses Brien's latest rant. 

UPDATE 12-28-08:  Brien Jones has launched a new site, BonnieKayLies, where he cross-posts his rants from the Jones Harvest Blog. I was scrolling through his blather when I came across his remarkable take on Kaye's efforts to expose the fraud at Airleaf, which eventually led to the Indiana Attorney General shutting down the scam:

In my opinion Bonnie Kaye wanted her books published and sold for free. That’s what she did to Airleaf Publishing. Bonnie Kaye didn’t complain then. Why would she? Then when Airleaf didn’t pay HER enough Bonnie Kaye started a vicious campaign against them (thankfully long after I resigned my position there.)

When Bonnie Kaye was done with Airleaf what happened? The owner walked away scot-free, ‘thanks for all the swell money.’ The people that were there when it closed started their own companies. The only real result of Bonnie Kaye’s campaign was over 1000 authors lost the books they paid to have published.

Then along comes me and Jones Harvest Publishing. ‘Well’ Bonnie Kaye says, ‘let’s try it again.’

Uh-huh. In other words, Brien and his friends at Airleaf did nothing wrong. I guess Brien didn't read the Attorney General's report on the Airleaf  fraud. Maybe that's why he hasn't learned from his mistakes and seems intent on repeating them.

The Mail I Get – The Risk You Take Edition

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Today I got an angry email from Joe Blow whose note was the basis for one of my "Mail I Get" posts. He wrote, in part:

I am really upset that you used my email in your Mail I Get feature. I specifically told you when I wrote to you that I didn't want to see my email turn up in your Mail I Get feature and that's exactly what you did with it.  How could you? 

Because your email was insipid, Joe, and I certainly don't feel any need to comply with your orders. I don't work for you. And if you read my blog enough to know that I regularly post emails that I get, then you should have known better than to send me one if you were afraid of seeing it posted. I've said it before but I will say it again…

1) if you are a stranger, and you send me an email asking for advice, you should assume that I will post your email (minus identifying information) and my answer on my blog so others may benefit from it…or be entertained by it. That said, I probably post less than 10% of the emails I get asking for advice. There are so many blogs out there offering screenwriting and publishing advice, and who do it far better than I do, that I am picky about what I post. It has to be either a really good, or a really inane, question for me to blog about it. Yours, Joe, was really inane.

2) If you send me an email trying to sell me your book, your product, or your service, you should assume I will post your spam on my blog and ridicule it. Most of the pitches I get are too mundane to merit a blog post, though.

3) If you are a vanity press, and you send me a solicitation, you should assume I will post your email on my blog and evicerate you. That should go without saying.

Look at the bright side, Joe.  At least I don't call people fucktards…as other members of my family do.