Can You Make a Living as a Writer?

I’m starting to get more mail, and more questions, than the Playboy Advisor. I  received this email yesterday:

Dear Mr. Goldberg,
 
I’m a young, unpublished writer who’s been fortunate enough to get the
attention of a couple of agents.  Since I might one day find myself published
(it does seem so far off, though), I have a few questions for a tried and true
veteran of the industry.
 
First, how likely is it to make a living as a writer?  I understand how
broad and poorly concieved this question is, so let my add a little more to the
question.  I write literary fiction.  I feel I am somewhat talented and I work
hard.  I’m curious as to the possibility of living as a writer or teaching
writing as a direct result of my writing and not spending $60k and two
irreplacable years of my life to get some MFA that will teach me nothing.  How
much can a literary novelist really make?  It seems stupid to assume I’ll never
make any money just because I write books that read a little too artsy for mass
consumption (but then who is to predict such things).
 
Second, and possibly more immediate, I’m going into the Army for the next
three and a half years or so.  Is this something that will impede my getting
published?  As I have already stated, I have agents looking at my work now and
they have no idea of my plans.
 
Thanks for reading my questions.  I hope I haven’t asked anything too
inappropriate.

Steve

Since I didn’t have the answers to any of his questions, I turned to my brother Tod, a literary novelist who, presumably, is earning a living at it. Here’s what Tod told the guy who wrote me:

Steve,

My brother Lee Goldberg forwarded your question on to me, since I was in a
similar situation as you (save for the military) a few years ago.

 
It is certainly possible to make a living writing literary fiction, though
realistically most people don’t. I’ve published two novels and have a short
story collection coming out in September and what I can tell you is that the
combined income from those books isn’t enough to live on, though the acclaim
feeds my ego, just not my stomach. I got lucky and was able to sell one of my
novels to Hollywood and have thus far received far more money from my movie
options than I ever have in publishing, enough to live on, certainly. But I also
teach at the Writers’ Program at UCLA and write a weekly column for a newspaper
and regularly contribute journalism to magazines. If I wanted to teach full time
at the University level I imagine I probably could now because of certain award
nominations, publications and experience, but without an MFA (which I don’t have
either) a full time teaching job straight out the box for a young person with a
book would be very difficult to come by without a fairly vast and accomplished
publishing history. Universities and state colleges generally want their
graduate and undergraduate professors to have advanced degrees no matter what.
 
How much does a literary novelist make? Anywhere from $2000 per book to
1million — there’s no real telling. Alice Sebold didn’t get a huge advance for
the Lovely Bones, but she sure earned a lot of money and her next book will
certainly garner a fat advance. I wouldn’t be too concerned about the money at
this point, just about the writing. Good writing gets rewarded, but so does bad
sometimes. I’d just focus on writing well and if you sell your novel, it’s a
dream come true no matter the numbers on the check.
 
As for the military, I think it probably does hamper your chances simply
because of the opportunity, or lack there of, you’ll have to write and should
you sell your book, to promote it. Of course, you could come back from your time
in the Army as the next Tim O’Brien, though I sure hope that isn’t the case on a
psychological level; talent-wise, it wouldn’t be a bad deal at all.
 
Just out of curiosity, who are these agents and why are they interested in
you, especially if you never been published previously?
 
I hope this helps. Let me know if you have more questions. And be safe out
there in the army.
 
Tod Goldberg

 

More on Publish America

I got this email today:

Hello Lee,
I am a writer wondering if I should go with Publish America. Take a look at
my website and let me know what you think.

I don’t know why  he wanted me to look at his website, or what difference it would make.  Anyway, here’s how I responded to his query:

Don’t. It’s a scam. If you are that eager to have your book in print, and have
failed to find a home with a real publisher, go to iUniverse. At least they are
honest about who they are and what they do (self-publishing)… their books look
professional (very slick and well bound)…and they pay royalties on a regular
basis (assuming you’ve earned some).

My experiences with iUniverse have been through the Authors Guild’s Back In Print program and the Mystery Writers of America. In both cases, iUniverse offered to reprint previously published, out-of-print  titles free-of-charge to the author.  I used those services to reprint my UNSOLD TELEVISION PILOTS book, which previously had only been available in a very expensive hardcover edition… and MY GUN HAS BULLETS, which never sold to paperback. In both cases, I was very pleased with my experience and I’ve been getting royalties from iUniverse on a regular, quarterly basis.  It’s not big money… but it’s money I wouldn’t have seen otherwise if I hadn’t taken advantage of the program. The Authors Guild still offers the Back In Print program, but I believe the Mystery Writers of America program has ended.

Put Another Script on the Barbie

I got this email today… from Australia. I can’t imagine why this person’s script hasn’t sold… can you?

This is a plea for help. A plea for someone to PLEASE read my script and help me with producing it – or even forwarding it on to someone for them to have a look at it.

I sent a re-make of "Grapes of Wraith" which I spenf AGES writing to Nicole Kidman – only to have her Agent replying back "Send to someone else – we dont deal with this" – I thought – yeh thanks for your help.I havent seen another Nicole Kidman movie yet. This was around two to three years ago.

Please, Please Lee – Can you please Help

How Not To Get Your Book Published II

I had this email exchange today.  This exchange is verbatim, I haven’t corrected or changed any of the spellings, grammar, etc:

Dear Mr Goldberg

I was wondering since you published a few books do you know any good traditional publsihing companies? I translated my father’s book and I am looking for a publsihing company. Please let me know.

I replied that there are many publishing companies, but that she’d be better off finding an agent first. She responded as follows:

Dear mr. goldberg

if it’s not a problem can you please give me the names of some traditional publishing companeis you contatcted with.

Thank You

So I sent her a list of publishing companies. And she replied:

Dear Mr Golberg,

I am sorry to bother you thrid time in one day. I was wondering if any of those publishing companeis will agree to at elast conscider my manuscript can I tell them that you refered me to them or you don;t want me to? Do you know if you are going to be on any book signings in IL soon? Thank You

Can you believe the chutzpah? I sent her back a terse note telling her that NO, she could not use me as a reference since I didn’t know her and haven’t read her book. But judging by her emails, I don’t have a lot of faith in her translating skills…

Sell Books! Get Rich

I got this unsolicited email today:

Get Bookstore Orders for your Books!! Would you like to get your book on the shelves in bookstores nationally? Visit www.WritersUniverse.net  today!!

Writer’s Universe meets monthly with book buyers as well as representatives from major libraries across the country — We will get you book orders! Book Store and Library Package — $500 for six week campaign. This is a limited time offer. We will get you book orders! WritersUniverse.net specializes in book orders from book stores as well as public libraries. Put our specialization to work to today.

I’m assuming I received this pitch because several of my "out-of-print" books were republished by iUniverse through the Authors Guild’s "back-in-print" program…because someone published by a major publisher wouldn’t have to hire freelance book reps. Or are they publicists? I went to their website to get more info. But their site is suspiciously threadbare when it comes to actual details about the services they provide and what a small-press or self-published author can realistically expect to gain for their $500.

Has anybody ever had an experience with them? Are they legit… or just another scam that takes advantage of the self-published?

How Do I Write a Treatment?

I received this email today:

I am trying to pitch a movie. My question: Is there a specific format for an outline or treatment? Is there someplace I could get a sample of either or both?

Unless you are an established screenwriter, or are teamed up with a well-connected movie producer, there is no point in writing up an outline or a treatment. No one will ever read it or meet with you. You are better off writing the script…or the book… and trying to sell that to the movies.

On the other hand, if you are an established screenwriter or aligned with a hot producer, you still don’t need an outline… a simple, punchy, two-page  "leave-behind" after your verbal pitch will do.

If they want an outline or a treatment, they can pay you for one.

That’s my advice, any way. Then again, most of my experience is in television, not feature film. You might visit screenwriter John August’s blog and pose the same question to him.

UPDATE: For details on how to write a series treatment, click here.

I’m Glad This Isn’t MY Agent…

I got an email today from an agent who is having trouble selling his client’s crime thriller screenplay. Every development exec he submits the script to says they aren’t interested in the project unless there is “some talent attached.” The agent wanted to know “if you have any suggestions how to get around this” and also if I was interested in reading the script… and if I wasn’t, if I knew of any producers who were looking for great new material.

I was astounded. What kind of agent needs to ask another screenwriter the best way to get his client’s material to buyers? Here’s the advice I gave him:

By “talent,” they usually mean an actor, director, or major producer. But it’s just an excuse. No offense intented, but what they are really saying is they think the script is terrible, or it sounds terrible, or they aren’t interested in your client at all. The only way I know of to get around this is to have a kick-ass idea, a great script, a powerful agent, or as the development people have told you, a big name involved with the project. The bottom line is, whoever you’re talking to simply isn’t interested in what you have to sell. Russell Crowe would have to walk in the door with the script under his arm for them to give a damn.

What I didn’t say was if this agent was any good at his job, he’d have relationships with the right development people. He’d know what they were looking for and who the right people would be to send the script to. The development people would respect the agent, know the kind of writers the agent represented, and would decide whether or not to read the script based on that. The email I received tells me this is an agent who doesn’t have relationships, doesn’t have much experience, and shouldn’t be trying to sell anybody’s screenplay. But if that didn’t tell me, his next two questions did.

Are you interested in “a terrific feature screenplay?”

Only the ones that I write. I’m in the same position as your client. I don’t buy scripts, I try to sell my own! So that kind of answers your next question, too…

Maybe if you are not looking but know someone who is you can point us in that direction?

If I knew such a person, I would be sending them my script!

I wouldn’t want this guy representing me. The screenwriter would almost be better off with no agent at all, sending his script out on his own…

What do you think?

The Mail I Get

I am not a documentary film producer, nor am I in the documentary film business. And yet, I still get emails like this:

I am an amatuer film producer. I have a great idea for a on going documentary series, I would love to run the idea (in its in infancy) to somone…i can make it happen. The basic is coverage on nj’s new problem with young youth, gangs, ets. I am a youth worker at the Juvenile Justice Commision. There is sooooo much opurtunity for a great 3 part series. It would be based on a youth worker/ Convicte juveniles lives and tribulations inside these programs that are rehabilitional services there are so many secret occurences that would wow an audience. Its NJ’s dirty secret. It could even strech over a 5 year span, mabey once every 6 months. I’m talking real footage and a study of the mental idealology of these youths. Thugs that cant even think for themselves and the problems of the JJC. amazing stuff. I have it all in my mind on how to make it work. killer-drug dealing robbing thugs in real life, but boys in here. Its amazing. they dont have the capability to make the most basic decisions. Please call me and here me out. It would be memorable. I true look into NJ’s dirty little secret of what the future of America is looking at. Music impact…..movie impact.. endless interestin insight into the mind and actions of these children. I cant begin to explain. i could get interviews live footage.. travel to there homes.. interview families. Its about a new wave of mental disorder that is dumbfounding.

Don’t people stop to think before they said me stuff like this? Just because I am an episodic TV writer/producer, that doesn’t mean I want to hear everybody’s ideas for reality shows, movies, and books…

I thought if I started posting this stuff on my blog, people would stop sending it to me for fear of embarrassment. I guess I was wrong.

The Mail I Get…

The networks are run by space aliens….and this man is ready to expose it:

My TV Program Flattened the WTC, Oh, the power of the media or did I piss of the aliens?

I am a celebrity publisher and former NASA scientist that has been censored and exiled. I would like to produce and star in an investigative tv series that is a combination of “Geraldo” meets “The X-Files”.

If you want to get involved in this series and you are not afraid of the alien race then contact me.

Sincerely Yours,

Wayne E. Manzo,
Publisher, Human Rights Leader, Scientist
wmanzo@yahoo.com
http://www.geocities.com/movies_alien/
http://wmovie.tripod.com/
http://www.geocities.com/tv_access/
http://www.geocities.com/mansuedotcom/

So, if Space Aliens are running network television, why didn’t Gary Coleman ever get another TV series?