Please Curb Your Realtor

E8bdbacf72034d35969af9a590135dd3 My sister has been finding a realtor’s droppings on her front porch and she doesn’t like it:

At least once a week a shady looking character leaves her promotional crap at my front door.  Kim, if you’re reading this, and I am sure you might be because you’re probably the type of person who checks her site stats hourly, I’LL NEVER HIRE YOU TO SELL MY HOUSE. I WILL, HOWEVER, BE LEAVING VISUAL CHRONICLES POSTCARDS, BOTTLE CAPS AND MAGNETS ALL OVER YOUR FRONT DOOR. SEE HOW YOU LIKE IT.

You go girl!

(That’s a picture of the realtor, not my sister, by the way)

11 thoughts on “Please Curb Your Realtor”

  1. The thing I wish they’d curb is cold calling – rarely does an evening pass when I don’t get someone trying to convince me to chane phone companies, or electricity or gas suppliers. Alternatively, I get people trying sell me their brand of religion – the last time one came, I offered them my “British Humanist” magazine in exchange for theirs. They didn’t take up the kind offer.
    And that realtor is that what we would call an estate agent?) reminds me of the Dr Who episode, “Terror of the Autons” where shop dummies come alive. It wouldn’t surprise me at all to find out she’s being controlled by the Nestene Consiousness.

  2. Is it just me, or does ‘’ have a certain sinister ring to it? I’m not really sure that I want to be in escrow, thanks.

  3. I hate this, too. Over the Fourth holiday, a local realtor went around sticking American flags (with his business card attached) in all of our lawns. Thanks, but what if I’m a communist bastard, something?

  4. If you’re a Commie Bastard, you don’t own a house, and thus have no need for a Realtor. 🙂
    We get a lot of these too, but the maid services are even worse. And what’s with the guys who go door-to-door from the pest control company?

  5. If you really want to enjoy yourself, I encourage each of you to visit Ms. White’s “about me” page on her website. Because I care deeply about each of you, I’ve pulled out a few bon mots:
    “Kim White’s performance measures her success. Hard worker, Kim pays attention to the smallest details. Priding herself on personal attention she offers her clients the very finest professional service.”
    I like that bit about “Hard worker, Kim…” and “finest professional services.” It sort of reads like the ads in the back of the Weekly in your town (or at least the Weekly I write for…)
    “Prior to joining the Real Estate field, Kim worked several years in the entertainment industry.”
    Uh-huh. I’m guessing Executive Producer.
    “Kim is an established high achiever who will guide you through a smooth transaction. Your satisfaction is her objective!”
    I just had a smooth transaction. Coffee really does the trick for me…


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