Television

Becoming a TV Writer

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Paul Guyot has an excellent post today about becoming a TV writer and what it takes to stay in the game. Here’s a taste from his very long, very informative post:

Starting out you must have skin like a Rhino. You could get lucky and land on
a show with a very smart, very secure showrunner like I did – one who encouraged
the writer’s original voice, one who liked to teach, one who wanted to get as
much of the writer’s words into the show.

Or you could land where I’ve also been – on a show where you’re seen as a
threat, an outsider, someone who hasn’t proved themselves – and in their eyes
that means someone who didn’t go through the same shit they went through. It can
be like fraternity hell week… only lasting a whole season. You can be writing
your ass off, knowing you’re doing good work – better than others – and still
have your work slammed. Still be completely rewritten. To the point where, when
the show airs, you’re almost embarrassed to have your name on it. Not because
it’s so awful, but because there’s not a single word of yours left.

But you shut up and take it. You do your job.

My friend Paul moans all the time about shutting down his blog, but it’s because of fantastic essays about the biz like this one that I hope he never does. Keep’em coming, Paul!

 

A Touch of Class

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Today, for reasons I will never understand, I got an email offering me the amazing opportunity to buy an I DREAM OF JEANNIE bottle autographed by the cast:

The incomparable magnetism of this 2nd-thru 5th Season Metallic Purple I Dream
of Jeannie Brass Bottle is a must-! YES, Dreams DO come true, as you will
discover upon adding this classic and breathtaking Jeannie Bottle to your
collection.

ONCE IN A LIFETIME OPPORTUNITY!
A "SIGNED LIMITED EDITION" SIGNED BY BARBARA
EDEN, LARRY HAGMAN, BILL DAILY, AND THE OFFICIAL BOTTLE ARTIST!
"YES" SIGNED BY THE CAST JUST FOR “YOU”!!!!!!
THIS IS THE OFFICIAL 40TH ANNIVERSARY BOTTLE, METALIC PURLE, BRASS
GALLERY EDITION ‘I DREAM OF JEANNIE’ BOTTLE!

It’s hard to believe, but for the cost of self-publishing your unsaleable book, you can have this amazing bottle! That’s right…you can own this masterpiece for just  $549! But wait, there’s MORE! Foronly $25, you can get a priceless photo of the celebrities signing your bottle! But wait, there’s even more MORE reasons to buy this destined-for-the-Louvre artistic masterpiece of fine art!

MOST IMPORTANTLY, BECAUSE 10% WILL ALSO GO TO VICTIMS OF HURRICANE KATRINA, AND
WHAT A WAY TO HELP SOMEONES WISH COME TRUE, BUT WITH A JEANNIE BOTTLE!

Don’t waste a second.  Think how wonderful this will look next to your STAR TREK salt shakers, Elvis ashtray, and BABYLON 5 nosehair clippers. It’s just the touch of elegance your basement needs. Show your parents that although you never moved out of the house, you’ve got class.

Room 222

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Enrollment has begun for our next online session of Beginning Television Writing. The four-week course begins Oct. 24th and is a lot of fun…at least for your humble instructors. Here’s the listing from Writers University:

In this four week course, two established executive producers/showrunners
[That would be William Rabkin and me ] will give you an inside look at the world of episodic television. You will
learn—and practice— the actual process involved in successfully writing a spec
episodic script that will open doors across Hollywood. You will learn how to
analyze a TV show and develop “franchise”-friendly story ideas. You will develop
and write a story under the direction of the instructors, who will be acting as
showrunners… and then, after incorporating their notes, you will be sent off to
write your outline. Finally, you will develop and refine your outline with the
instructors, leaving you at the end of the course ready to write your episodic
spec script…the first step in getting a job on a TV series.

We look forward to seeing your in our virtual classroom.

Extreme Series Make-overs

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LeeandcastBlogger Brent McKee is talking today about what happens when TV shows undergo a major creative overhaul. One of the examples he uses is MARTIAL LAW:

The first season was brilliant with one
of the few sour notes being the inclusion of Arsenio Hall as a cast member. It
didn’t get good ratings and the show was handed over to Lee Goldberg and William
Rabkin, who were posting on rec.arts.tv at the time. The gutted the show –
tossed out every actor except Sammo Hung, Kelly Hu and Arsenio Hall – and
created a sort of mytharc which was so incredibly stupid that even devoted fans
were sickened. I swear that if Rabkin and/or Goldberg were standing in front of
me at the time I’d have gotten as many good shots as I could and I have the
feeling a lot of fans would have done the same thing.

I won’t waste time defending our creative decisions on MARTIAL LAW (anyone remember Louis Mandylor? I didn’t think so), but I would hardly call the first season "brilliant" by any stretch. By far the biggest problem with the show was that it starred a guy who couldn’t speak English and a talkshow host pretending to be an actor, neither of whom liked each other much and both of whom were very difficult people to work with.

I’ve been integrally involved in the revamping of three shows — THE COSBY MYSTERIES, DIAGNOSIS MURDER, and SEAQUEST — and in each of those cases, I’d argue the shows were greatly improved (of course!). However of the three series, only DIAGNOSIS MURDER enjoyed a big spike in ratings and critical acclaim as a result of our changes.

The truth is that a revamped show rarely survives… and for good reason. A revamp is an act of total desperation. If the show wasn’t already in serious creative or ratings decline, it wouldn’t need an extreme make-over — or, in some cases, two or three  (look how many formats ELLEN went through before it died). But there have been shows that have survived…and even thrived… after radical revamps, MANNIX being one of the best examples.

My favorite extreme TV series make-over revolved around a western called KLONDIKE…about cowboys in Alaska in the 1880s. The ratings sucked. So the show was pulled and it came back two weeks later as ACAPULCO. Same cast, different format, warmer setting. The change didn’t help and the show was cancelled after a few episodes…

Shake-Up at COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF

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According to the Hollywood Reporter, there’s been a major shake-up behind-the-scenes of the season’s most successful new series. Steven Bochco is taking over as commander-in-chief of the ABC series COMMANDER-IN-CHIEF, replacing creator/showrunner/director Rob Lurie, who is moving on to develop other series. This is one of the few times that someone of Bochco’s stature has taken over a series he wasn’t associated with before… a common rescue operation usually left to journeyman showrunners, not Emmy-winning writer/creator/prod co. chiefs who usually work in their own lucrative kingdoms. This would be like David E. Kelley taking over JUST LEGAL or  John Wells taking over INCONCEIVABLE though that isn’t entirely, um,  inconceivable. Wells was brought in by ABC a few seasons back in a desperate bid  to save their troubled series THE COURT, a show he previously had nothing to do with.

The Unaired

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There have been a bunch of shows cancelled in the last few weeks after only an episode or two. But it could be worse. At least they aired. There are have been a surprising number of series over the years that were picked up by networks, went into production, and were  cancelled without ever airing.

Laf034For example, Fox shut down writer/producer Glenn Gordon Caron’s series FLING after seven episodes were produced and never aired them. They also cancelled the Scott Baio sitcom REWIND without airing it. And the same network had second thoughts after renewing FIRE CO 132 and shelved all 13 episodes produced for the show’s revamped  second season.

A pre-nose job, pre-L&O Benjamin Bratt starred in three episodes of JUAREZ, an ABC cop show that never aired.  The WB cancelled MANCHESTER PREP  afterCruelintentions2dvdcover shooting three episodes that didn’t air — but were later cut together into a direct-to-DVD movie (CRUEL INTENTIONS 2). A few years ago, TNT shelved all 13 episodes of its new drama series  BREAKING NEWS without airing it (Bravo later burned off the episodes).

This is hardly a new phenomenon — NBC ordered 13 episodes of David Brenner’s sitcom SNIP in the late 70s and cancelled the show without ever broadcasting it. There was an NBC sitcom that met a similar fate in the last season or two, but I can’t recall the name.

Anyone else remember any other series that were cancelled before the produced episodes ever saw the light of a cathode ray tube?

The Primetime Dead

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138_1The triggermen at the networks have very itchy fingers. The WB killed Jerry Bruckheimer’s JUST LEGAL, starring Don Johnson, after a mere three episodes and NBC aborted INCONCEIVABLE, starring Angie Harmon, after only two airings. 

But there was some good news for a couple of freshman shows — SUPERNATURAL on the WB and MY NAME IS EARL on NBC got  full season pick-ups.  Variety predicts that full season pick-ups are in the offing for CBS’s "How I
Met Your Mother," "Criminal Minds" and "Ghost Whisperer"; Fox’s "Bones"; and
ABC’s "Commander In Chief."

Midseason shows are already being lined up. NBC has greenlit 13 episodes of Dick Wolf’s CONVICTION, a series about prosecutors that will scavenge left-over sets from LAW AND ORDER: TRIAL BY JURY. Variety reports there’ s a possibility that new Wolf show may yet become part of the LAW AND ORDER franchise.

The Invisible Character

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Helfer2On NIP/TUCK last week, one of the characters had a long conversation at a bar with someone who wasn’t there — an old lover who ran off to France. But as I was watching the scene, I realized what seemed like a novel notion just a few years ago — characters talking to full-bodied ghosts/figments of their imagination — has rapidly become a cliche. Now the technique is being used everywhere you look on TV and in every genre you can think of.  SIX FEET UNDER, NIP/TUCK, BATTLESTAR GALACTICA, GHOST WHISPERER, LOST, MEDIUM,
MISSING, and MONK are just some of the shows that regularly employ the "talking to people who aren’t there" gimmick. I don’t know for sure where it started (SIX FEET UNDER?) but it’s become a staple now of dramatic television. And it’s stupid. Think about it  — when was the last time you, or anybody you know who isn’t institutionalized, believed they were seeing and talking to someone who, actually, wasn’t there?

(Oh, and a caveat — this rant is coming from someone who has used the gimmick once or twice himself).

Crimetime Television

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From Variety today…

DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES creator Marc Cherry is teaming up with CHUCKY creator Don Scardino to develop an "hour-long suspense" drama for ABC called KILL/SWITCH (which features a "dead heroine").  Cherry is also mulling a DH spin-off called VICIOUS CHEERLEADERS.

24 creators  Joel Surnow and Robert Cochran are developing a private eye series for FOX. The series is described as a modern-day LA CONFIDENTIAL and will track a single case for 13 episodes.

Surnow said he and Cochran were also inspired by everything from "The Maltese
Falcon" to Raymond Chandler.

"We’re going to steal from as many movies as possible," Surnow quipped.
"There’s a wonderful, visual style to it that we haven’t really seen on TV. What
we like about film noir is it’s very sexy – we hope to do to that genre what we
did with the spy genre."

Meanwhile, things aren’t looking good for the critically savaged E-RING, which was fourth in it’s timeslot, and the ratings for CSI:NY were down 37% compared to last season.