TV Deja Vu…again

by

Don’t the program execs at ABC talk to one another about their shows?

On BOSTON LEGAL, one of the female lawyers is falling in love with a client who is dying.  At the same time, over on GREY’S ANATOMY, one of the female doctors is falling in love with a patient who is dying.

On BOSTON LEGAL, one of the lawyers is seduced into bed by her ex-husband…0nly to find out the jerk is still married. At the same time, over on DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES, one of the housewives is seduced into bed by her ex-husband…only to find out the jerk is still married.

This is the End

by

Mark Evanier links to two TV critics and their lists of the Top Five Series finales of all time.  For me, the best would include MARY TYLER MOORE, STAR TREK: THE NEXT GENERATION, NEWHART, THE FUGITIVE,  LARRY SANDERS,  M*A*S*H, THE PAPER CHASE and CHEERS.

My list of the worst finales would include SEINFELD, MAGNUM PI, MIAMI VICE,  FRIENDS, ST. ELSEWHERE, QUANTUM LEAP, NYPD BLUE and the two that MAGNUM PI had (the original,  which ended with Magnum getting killed… and the second,  after they talked Selleck into doing one more season, which  ended with Magnum getting married).

I’m a big TV geek, and a sucker for finales, but I’m not sure they are a good idea. Sure, you get a ratings pop, and they give audiences a chance to say goodbye to characters they love.  But I think one reason the majority of "final episodes" are mediocre at best is because most TV series, by their very nature, are intentionally conceived to be open-ended and run forever. How do you conclude something that was never designed to be concluded?

It’s one thing for Dr. Richard Kimble to finally be proved innocent, or for the castaways on LOST to finally discover what-the-hell-is-going-on. THE FUGITIVE and LOST are series built on ongoing quests for absolution and answers.  But do we really need to tie things up for private eyes, doctors, and homicide cops who we watch because we enjoy seeing them do their jobs?

In many ways, EVERYBODY LOVES RAYMOND had the best finale of all — just another great episode.

The Personal Touch

by

I got this "personal" email today from Matt Burke at Vendorpro:

I’ve been to your Lee Goldberg website and I think your books are perfect for our stores. I especially like "Diagnosis Murder Series". We work hand in hand with the largest stores in the country, plus thousands of small to medium sized specialty businesses stretched across the U.S. If you want the opportunity to sell your books through major retailers like Barnes and Noble, Borders, Amazon.com, Waldens, Target, QVC, HSN, etc …plus the other 51005 gift stores, 16826 bookstores, and over 24000 mail-order catalogs…check us out.

Here’s what I told Matt. I thanked him for the personal email. It gave me a good indication of his honesty, attention to detail and professionalism… because if he’d really been to my site, he’d know my DIAGNOSIS MURDER books are published by Penguin/Putnam, one of the largest publishers in the world, and are already available at major retailers.  Matt needs to work on his pitch (or at least do his homework) before sending out his junk mail — or, at the very least, give up the pretense that he knows anything about me or my books.

Channel Surfing

by

THE WEST WING seems to be going out with a snore rather than a bang. The second-to-last-episode, which aired Sunday night, was a total snooze. I expected much more of a build-up to the series finale. Instead, this once-great show has just sort of petered out over the last few episodes. It’s sad.

Maybe that’s because a lot of John Wells’ best writers are now working on THE UNIT, my new guilty pleasure. It’s invigorating,  action-adventure silliness, and I’m loving every minute of it. The show is like nothing else on television… except perhaps DEADWOOD, in that it’s one of the few series today where the characters, as a group, have a unique voice, a distinct way of speaking (in this case, you could call it Mamet-speak). It’s the best show CBS has put on the air since the original C.S.I.

Speaking of DEADWOOD, I can’t wait until the third season premiere next month…I think I’ve come to enjoy it even more than THE SOPRANOS (Is it just me, or has THE SOPRANOS become more of a comedy this season than ever before?)

Not Interested

by

I got this email the other day. Here it is, in its entirety:

For anyone interested.

Real grabber, isn’t it? Who could resist clicking the link after a pitch like that? The link takes you to a blog, where Steve Clackson has posted the first few chapters of SAND STORM, his novel-in-progress, for which he is seeking an agent and publisher. I’m not sure what he hopes to gain by sending me the link. A manuscript critique? A referral to my agent or editor? A TV series option? Whatever it is, I’m not interested. But forget about me…what about the others he’s doubtlessly sent this link to?

Does he really think an agent will stumble on his blog and offer to represent him? Or that a publisher will be so enthralled by his prose that they’ll offer him a book contract? Or that a development exec at some studio will read it and beg to buy the movie rights? Sure, some blogs and websites have led to book and movies deals. But it’s exceedingly rare.

My advice to Steve is to take the chapters down. The book clearly needs lots of work before it’s going to be ready to submit to an agent or publisher. And he isn’t doing himself any favors by posting the rough chapters publicly and — cringe — posting a cheesy, home-made "cover" and — big cringe — linking to a "review" of the pages from some blogger.

Where do people get these really, really bad ideas?

UPDATE 5-26-06:  For reactions and discussions prompted by this post, look here, here, here, here, here and here. The consensus, with a couple of exceptions, seems to be that I’m a bully who reacted too harshly (one blogger, David Thayer,  likened this dust-up to "Godzilla vs. Bambi"). Perhaps that’s true… I was certainly in a sour mood last week.

Insanity Presses

by

Writer Kristine Kathryn Rusch talks about tie-in writing and the publishing biz in an interesting interview with SciFi.com. Along the way, she had this to say about self-publishing:

Vanity presses are called "vanity" presses for a reason. They appeal
to the writer’s vanity, not the writer’s sanity. Stay away if you want
to be a serious writer.

Good advice!

Viva LAS VEGAS

by

141651678601_sclzzzzzzz_
Author Jeff Mariotte talks on his Amazon blog about the unique obstacles he faced writing the first original LAS VEGAS series tie-in novel. He worked up an outline, turned it into the show’s creator/ep Gary Scott Thompson, and went off on a road trip with his family before hunkering down to write:

During that
time, Gary had a new idea.  Since I wasn’t checking e-mail every day on
the road, I missed an e-mail scheduling a new conference call.  Gary
kindly agreed to yet another to make up for the one I missed, and he
told me his new idea.  At the end of Season Two, the Montecito Hotel
and Casino was blown up.  Season Three picked up six months later,
during which time a new one had been built.  All the characters had
been scattered to the winds, relationships had ended or changed, and
one character, Nessa Holt, wasn’t returning.  Gary wanted the show to
pick up with the opening of the new Montecito, and didn’t want to have
to fill in the missing six months on the air.  So he wanted the novel
to do that, to tell fans where Nessa went, what happened between Danny
and Jenny, how the new Montecito was built so quickly, etc.

In many ways, I bet this was a creative blessing for Jeff.  It allowed Jeff to break new ground creatively with the characters and yet, at the same time, still remain true to the show.  It will be a hard act to follow for his second LAS VEGAS book…assuming another calamity doesn’t befall the characters in this season’s finale.

Dr. Who Taken Prisoner

by

22484772
The long gestating remake of the cult TV series THE PRISONER is on the fast-track for the UK’s Sky One.  Zap2it reports that Christopher Eccleston, who starred in the first season of the revived DR. WHO series, is now taking on the role of Number Six, originally portrayed by Patrick McGoohan:

The new series, slated to run for six
episodes, would likely premiere sometime next year, 40 years after the
original debuted on ITV. Rumors of a new series have been percolating
for some time, but Sky One didn’t greenlight the project until this
week. Bill Gallagher, writer of the BAFTA Award-nominated series "Conviction"
(no relation to the NBC show) and "Clocking Off," will pen the scripts
for the new "Prisoner."

The TV Geek In You Will Never Die, and That’s the Frakkin’ Truth

by

You never outgrow being a TV geek. I’m proof of that. But you can’t even shake it off if you become an Emmy-winning producer of a cult hit series like, say, LOST. My friend Javi is proof of that.

it’s no secret that one of my favorite shows is “gilmore girls” (the
third spoke in my triumvirate of televisual greatness along with
galactica and 24) – so imagine my surprise when – during a quick break
from the mountain of work under which i currently find myself (remember
hulk in the secret wars – that’s me right now) – i happened upon an
instance, in a three-week-old episode, of lorelai gilmore saying
“frakking celine dion!”

i must have tivo-d that moment about a dozen times.

seriously,
that may have been the most transcendent vignette of television i have
experienced in recent memory (although the recent actions of secretary
of state james heller on 24 were pretty awesome – and reminiscent of
the famous punchline “you’re not gonna make a canoe out of me!”).  it
is also as decisive an acknowledgment of galactica’s newfound hipness
as you are likely to find. to have a character in a show that is as
relentlessly incompatible with most of the conventions of genre as
“gilmore girls” acknowledge ron moore’s reimagining of glenn larson’s
contribution to the vernacular is – to quote another sci-fi icon
“fantastic.”

I’d pity Javi if I wasn’t just as bad as he is. For me, the high point of MISSION IMPOSSIBLE III was hearing musical cues from the TV show in the score.