Sarah Weinman stumbled on this hilarious review of George R. R. Martin’s new book A FEAST FOR CROWS. Apparently, it should have been titled A FEAST OF NIPPLES.
A FEAST FOR CROWS has to be the most nippletastic book I’ve read
since, oh, Candy. It felt like not a page went by that a pair wasn’t
being pinched, suckled, eyed, prized, fondled, lopped off (seriously) or
otherwise palpated. Boys’ nipples, girls’ nipples, big brown nipples, fulsome
nipples, nipples like black diamonds, lactating nipples, male pepperoni-style
nipples. All kinds of nipples. It makes me wonder if a retread of Lord of
the Rings isn’t in order, with 100% more detail on the hobbit nipples.