Current Affairs

You Stole My Bad Idea

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E! is reporting that a guy named Jack Bunick is suing Jennifer Lopez for allegedly ripping off his idea for the flop UPN series SOUTH BEACH:

The hourlong show
premiered Jan. 11 and lasted eight episodes, proving that there is a
limit to how much tanning, nightclubbing and stereotypically snooty
behavior viewers can stand. Bunick is seeking monetary
damages and an injunction barring any further broadcasting of South
Beach (well, that second part sounds like a given anyway).

The report has amused the folks at MediaBistro:

This shows true savvy: Suing over a cancelled show. Clearly, loads of money to be gotten there.

John August is my Hero

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Screenwriter John August pleads with writers to take a vow to stop having characters crawl around in air vents.  Why? Because it’s stupid, lazy, unrealistic… AND STUPID.  I’ve even seen people in movies crawl through the airvents in a house.  So I applaud John for waging war against this inane cliche:

Here’s what I’m proposing:  The Screenwriter’s Vow of Air Vent Chastity.

I, John August, hereby swear that I shall never place a
character inside an air duct, ventilation shaft, or any other euphemism
for a building system designed to move air around.

One day, I’d love to win an Oscar. An Emmy. A Tony Award. But if all
I accomplished in my screenwriting life were reducing the number of
times characters climbed through air vents, I’d consider my work
successful.

Law & Order In Jeopardy

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Fox News is reporting that LAW AND ORDER could be facing the ax…and that there are big shake-ups happening on both sides of the camera. For one thing, Annie Parisse has abruptly quit as the A.D.A. and, according to Fox, Dick Wolf is having trouble recasting when word-on-the-street is that the show maynot be coming back. They also report that S. Epatha Mekerson walked off of a "crossover" episode with L&O:CRIMINAL INTENT in a dispute over how her character was being written.

There’s a significant morale problem, too. Sources say that there
have been "a lot" of firings, including a portion of the camera crew.

"None of the original writer-producers are there anymore," a source
said. "They’ve all been replaced by people from L.A. who don’t get the
show."

[…] If "Law & Order" does get cancelled, or renewed just long enough
to do a finale season, it won’t be a tremendous surprise. Sixteen
years, after all, is twice the length of the run of a regular hit show.
Still, insiders blame the constant reruns on TNT for over-saturating
the brand.

"Even they’re cutting back now," a source said.

NBC declined comment except to say: "It is the producers’ desire to
keep the season finale of ‘Law and Order’ under wraps because of some
surprising developments."

UPDATE 4-28-06: NBC renewed all three LAW & ORDER series today. The jury is still out on CONVICTION.

Lesbians Are Deadly

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On my drive back from Palm Springs, I was scanning the radiowaves for NPR, Prairie Home Companion, This American Life, or some other liberal-leaning entertainment. What I stumbled on was a program on a conservative Christian radio station (KJoy92?) discussing Marlin Maddoux’s book "Public Education Against America." It was the funniest — and scariest — thing I’ve heard in ages.

One of the most amazing charges the guest made was that parents should be against homosexuality even being mentioned in schools…since homosexuality is deadlier than cigarettes. Yes, that’s what he said, the gay and lesbian lifestyle is deadlier than cancer (and he made a point of saying it wasn’t because of AIDS). According to the guest, and presumably the book, homosexuals have significantly shorter life spans than lifetime smokers (most gays and lesbians die before they are 50, the guest asserted). So the argument the hosts and guest on the show were making was that it’s hypocrisy to tell our kids that smoking is wrong, that it will kill you, when being gay is much, much deadlier.

The hosts (a married couple) and the guest also claimed that studies irrefutably show that "humanistic education" and tolerance of homosexuality inevitably leads to Marxism. I almost had an accident looking for a pen in my car so I could write down the name of the show and some of their outrageous claims…but I couldn’t find one. But I was able to remember the name of the website selling the book. I’m still looking for an article that quotes some of the "facts" from this book so I can post them here.

I’ll say this, though, it was a very entertaining show…so over-the-top it was almost satire.

UPDATE: I found this nugget on a list of  anti-Gay "talking points" from Kerby Anderson, the new host of Maddoux’s radio show "Point of View," and who may have been the guy I heard on the radio yesterday:

4. Public health: Homosexual sex is dangerous and
destructive to the human body. The International Journal of
Epidemiology reports that the life expectancy at age 20 for gay and
bisexual men is 8 to 10 years less than for all men. If the same
pattern of mortality were to continue, researchers estimate that nearly
half of gay and bisexual men currently 20 years of age will not reach
their 65th birthday.

Goodbye to Gilmore Girls

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Word has hit the trades that GILMORE GIRLS writer/creator/showrunner Amy Sherman-Palladino and her husband Dan are leaving the show.

"Despite our best efforts to return and ensure the future of Gilmore Girls
for years to come, we were unable to reach an agreement with the studio
and are therefore leaving when our contracts expire at the end of this
season," said Amy and Dan in a statement. "Our heartfelt thanks go out
to our amazing cast, hard-working crew and loyal fans. We know that the
story lines from this season will continue into the next, and that the
integrity of the show will remain long after we leave Stars Hollow."

According to a statement released by Warner Bros., "While we are
disappointed that Amy Sherman-Palladino and Dan Palladino have decided
not to stay with the show next season, we are very confident that Dave
Rosenthal, an experienced writer/producer with the show, will make the
transition seamless moving into the seventh year of Gilmore Girls.
We want to thank Amy for creating and nurturing this wonderful series
for the past six years and giving us one of the most memorable
mother/daughter relationships in television history."

Good News For TV Writers

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The California State Supreme Court threw out a lawsuit by a writer’s assistant against the writers  and producers of FRIENDS. The assistant charged that the sexually explicit jokes and anecdotes shared among the writers in the writer’s room created a "hostile work environment." (You can read the full text of the decision here)

Because "Friends" was an "adult-oriented comedy show featuring sexual
themes," Lyle should have expected coarse language from writers producing jokes
and scripts for the show, the Supreme Court held in its ruling.

While the Fair Employment and Housing Act prohibits conduct that creates a
hostile or abusive workplace for women, it does not outlaw "sexually coarse and
vulgar language that merely offends," the high court said.

The case raised questions of how far TV comedy writers can go in pushing the
boundaries of taste in their private joke-writing sessions, with supporters of
the writers and producers arguing that Lyle’s suit infringed on their freedom of
speech.

The high court declined to address the free-speech issues raised in the
case.

"We have no occasion to determine whether liability for such language might
infringe on free speech rights," the court held.

The show’s writers claimed Lyle was fired because she was a slow typist who
often missed the jokes she was supposed to transcribe.