Television

Thanks to that scumbag William Simon, I have become a YouTube addict…and to justify my nocturnal wanderings over there, I’ve created a blog of TV main title sequences.

For many years, you could tune in to see Dr. Mark Sloan on DIAGNOSIS MURDER every Thursday night at 9 pm on CBS.  You can still tune in every Thursday night at nine to see Dr. Mark Sloan… only now you’ll find him on ABC, practicing medicine on GREY’S ANATOMY, and flauting his wonderous pecs:

"Grey’s Anatomy" certainly raised the steamy quotient again. Last week,
Dr. Mark Sloan (Eric Dane) walked out wearing only a towel and
displayed his chiseled body.

The characters may have the same name, but  I don’t think anybody is going to mistake Dick Van Dyke for Eric Dane.

…and it may just be the best show on television. The two-hour season opener was stunning. I really admire showrunner Ron Moore for the risks he’s willing to take with his characters and his franchise… and his absolute willingness (more like his zeal) to ignore all of TV’s Star Trek-inspired, scifi conventions. It’s a creative high-wire act and to see him at work is almost as entertaining for me as the show itself.

UPDATE: I think my brother Tod nails it.

Let me just say this once and for all and then we can be done with
it until, yeah, I feel the need to announce it again: Battlestar
Galactica fucking rules. What’s better than:

1. Fat Apollo.

2. Starbuck killing that Cylon and then finishing her dinner…because he’s just coming back in an hour anyway.

In a bid to get more subscribers, Showtime is offering free episodes of DEXTER, L WORD, WEEDS,  BROTHERHOOD, and SLEEPER CELL on Yahoo to get you hooked. They are also aggressively courting bloggers like me to get the word out. Obviously, its worked, since here I am, talking about it.But this is not the first time Showtime has tried to reach bloggers and their readers.

Several weeks before DEXTER premiered, Showtime sent bloggers personal emails with links to the pilot in an effort to generate word-of-mouth for the show within the blogosphere. As far as I know, this is the first time a network has so actively attempted to court bloggers to hype their shows.  DEXTER scored well in its premiere…it will be interesting to know, if it’s even possible to determine, how much Showtime’s aggressive web push played in those numbers.

I’m a TV geek. I kept every copy of TV Guide that came out since I was nine years old.  I couldn’t wait for the TV Guide Fall Preview Edition.  I used to make a conscious effort to watch (and tape) at least the first episode over every new
drama.

But this summer I gave away all my TV Guides to the Los Angeles County Library. I forgot to buy the TV Guide Fall Preview Edition. And this season, for the first time in my life, I seem to have no interest at all in the new fall shows.

I don’t know whether it’s because I’m too busy or if the shows themselves just aren’t that captivating. Or is it the serialized nature of most of them — and an unwillingness on my part to make the committment?  Or perhaps it’s the knowledge that most of the new shows will be cancelled — so why bother? — and I’ll get Emmy DVDs of the ones that survive.   Or maybe there are just too many shows on too many networks and not enough hours in the day to watch them all.

The point is, I’m just not watching. And I don’t feel like I’m missing anything. 

The only new series I’ve seen are SHARK and STUDIO 60.  I’ve got a bunch of others clogging my Tivo…but I doubt I’ll get to them before they are  deleted to make room for new stuff I won’t watch.  But like the rest of America, I’m keeping up on most of the shows I was watching before…like LAW AND ORDER: SVU, BOSTON LEGAL and GREY’S ANATOMY… and I can’t wait to see the new season of BATTLESTAR GALACTICA.

So have I changed…or has TV changed?

I’ve watched the first two episodes of  STUDIO 60 and I don’t like it. Here’s why.

1.  The fonts for the title cards and scene headings are the same ones they used on THE WEST WING.  That, combined with some of the same actors they used on THE WEST WING and the self-important characters and pompous speeches, makes it appear as if Aaron Sorkin thinks that running a TV show is as important as running the country. It’s not, though many showrunners I know thing it is. (UPDATE: Here’s a lively discussion on whether  the fonts matter or I have my head up my ass).
2. The series takes its inspiration from SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE, which hasn’t been relevant or buzzworthy in 25 years.  STUDIO 60 might as well behind-the-scenes series about THE CAROL BURNETT SHOW  or YOUR SHOW OF SHOWS. It feels incredibly dated and out-of-step. If they wanted to be cutting edge, it would have been about a show more akin to THE DAILY SHOW.  Heck, Garry Shandling’s THE LARRY SANDERS SHOW has been off-the-air for years and it’s still more relevant, biting, and funny than STUDIO 60.
3. Aaron Sorkin seems to think we’re all fascinated by his drug arrest during the making of THE WEST WING and his professional partnership with director Thomas Schlamme. We’re not. Watching Aaron Sorkin write about himself and Schlamme isn’t like Carl Reiner writing about himself  as Rob Petrie or even Larry David writing about himself as, um, Larry David because….because it just not as funny, fresh or entertaining as DICK VAN DYKE SHOW or CURB YOUR ENTHUSIASM.  It feels self-indulgent.
4. We keep hearing about  how funny and amazingly talented the lady is who leads STUDIO 60’s fictional cast…but so far  we haven’t actually seen her do anything funny (Ken Levine had the same observation)  In fact, there’s something downright creepy about her.
5. Ripping off the movie NETWORK in a scene, and then having all the characters refer to the scene as "like something from the movie NETWORK," doesn’t get you a pass for, well, ripping of the movie NETWORK.
6.  All that said, I do love the way he writes…I just wish he was writing a different show.

I’m supposedly a "TV insider," and yet I am completedly confused by the new season. I can’t tell KIDNAPPED from STANDOFF from VANISHED. It’s like last season, when every series seemed to be about an alien invasion (SURFACE, INVASION, etc.) or thieves plotting a big robbery (HEIST, THIEF, etc.)

What makes it even harder to tell all these kidnapping shows apart is the plethora of new, one-word titled shows this season…like RUNAWAY, HEROES, JUSTICE, SHARK, DAYBREAK, SMITH, JERICHO, and DEXTER to go along with LOST, HOUSE, BONES, SURVIVOR,MONK, SUPERNATURAL, NUMBERS etc. 

And then there’s THE NINE and SIX DEGREES. I don’t know which one of these two is which, do you?

There are only two new series I’m looking forward to — SHARK and HEROES.

I’m also curious about the recast LAW AND ORDER. Otherwise, it will be hard enough for me just to keep up with my favorites, like LAW & ORDER: SVU, GREY’S ANATOMY, BOSTON LEGAL, NIP/TUCK, THE UNIT, and BATTLESTAR GALACICA. And I have season boxed sets of THE SHIELD, RESCUE ME, HOUSE  and VERONICA MARS crying for attention on my shelf…

But who has the time???

I’ve been fascinated by TV pilots since I was a kid (and even wrote several books about them). One thing I’ve learned is that almost everybody in the business agrees that making pilots is a deeply flawed, inefficent, outrageously expensive way to create TV series and that the system needs to be changed. 

The Entertainment Industry Development
Corporation reports that 131 pilots were made last season at a cost of $365 million.  Of those pilots, maybe 40 got picked up. Of those 4o
series, maybe three or four will survive the season.

Insane, isn’t it?

So, naturally, the Canadians think it would be a great idea to imitate our system.

According to the latest issue of Canadian Screenwriter magazine (one of the perks of being a member of Writers Guild of Canada), the state-supported Canadian Broadcasting Company is "shifting its development process to pilots."  Here’s their thinking:

"(The U.S. networks) pilot a lot of things that never make it to air," says Kristine Layfield, the CBC’s executive director of network programming. "We’re going to have a lot better ratio of shows that actually make it because we’re hoping that if we’re putting more money, time and effort into the development process, by the time you get to pilot, that pilot has much more than a one-in-ten chance."

With all due respect, she is deluding herself. Does she really think we don’t put enough time, money and effort into the development process? We spent $365 million! What’s incredible is that  instead of learning from our mistakes, the Canadians want to repeat them.

No wonder  the Canadian TV business is virtually non-existent.