Marvin H. Albert

You may recall that I’ve got a guilty-pleasure-passion for the Frank Sinatra’s TONY ROME and LADY IN CEMENT movies, both of which were based on books by Marvin H. Albert (who also co-wrote the screenplay for LADY). Novelist, editor and paperback collector Bill Crider  has written an interesting article about Albert for this month’s issue of Mystery*File magazine. The article includes a complete bibliography of Albert’s work, compiled by Steve Lewis. Albert was an amazingly versatile, if unappreciated, writer whose work included screenplays, novels in several genres, and even movie tie-ins. He was one of a dying breed. 

Judging Books By Their Covers

I have to apologize to Kit Tunstall for making fun of her name…it was a cheap shot (I gambled that there was a 50/50 chance that  it wasn’t a pen-name and I lost). Her comment about all the money in e-book erotica made me curious about her…so I checked out her site. There may be, as she claims, a oodles of cash in the smutty e-book biz, but obviously none of the profits are going towards cover art. It turns out that the cover of her e-book PHANTASIE, so brilliantly lampooned by the Smart Bitches Who Love Trash Novels, is not half-as-bad as some of her others…
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I Found a “Fucktard’

Weekly27Each Sunday, my brother Tod dissects the letters to Parade Magazine’s Walter Scott and, from among that collection of idiots, christens someone a "fucktard." But this week, I’ve got Tod beat, whether he picks Jan G. from San Diego ("Robert Redford is as blond as ever. Why doesn’t he let his hair go gray?") or E. Zimmerman of Amana Iowa ("What’s with those tabloid photos of Jennfer Aniston cuddling Vince Vaughn? Are the two lovers?").Fred_thompson Because the biggest fucktard of all this Sunday won’t be found in Parade but in the TV Q&A column in the TV Times. J. Higa of Carson, California asks:

I see former Sen. Fred Thompson in the news and he looks just like the Fred Thompson on the TV show "Law and Order." Is he the same person?

No, Mr. or Mrs. Higa, it’s not the same person. They are identical twins with identical names, you fucktard.

Crimetime Television

From Variety today…

DESPERATE HOUSEWIVES creator Marc Cherry is teaming up with CHUCKY creator Don Scardino to develop an "hour-long suspense" drama for ABC called KILL/SWITCH (which features a "dead heroine").  Cherry is also mulling a DH spin-off called VICIOUS CHEERLEADERS.

24 creators  Joel Surnow and Robert Cochran are developing a private eye series for FOX. The series is described as a modern-day LA CONFIDENTIAL and will track a single case for 13 episodes.

Surnow said he and Cochran were also inspired by everything from "The Maltese
Falcon" to Raymond Chandler.

"We’re going to steal from as many movies as possible," Surnow quipped.
"There’s a wonderful, visual style to it that we haven’t really seen on TV. What
we like about film noir is it’s very sexy – we hope to do to that genre what we
did with the spy genre."

Meanwhile, things aren’t looking good for the critically savaged E-RING, which was fourth in it’s timeslot, and the ratings for CSI:NY were down 37% compared to last season.

The Plotting of LOST

There are creative squabbles on every show. Former LOST producer David Fury has made his public in a recent Rolling Stone interview, and my friend Javi, supervising producer of the show,  isn’t happy about it. But the squabbles aside, Javi’s lengthy post (which refutes Fury’s assertions) offers a fascinating insight into the development of LOST. While the details are unique to LOST, the process is applicable to most TV shows I’ve ever worked on…especially when it comes down to how individual episodes are crafted:

a good example of how the writers room works in a series such as
"lost"- and one that is extremely appropriate to this situation – is
the creation of the story that eventually became david’s emmy-nominated
episode "walkabout."

now, let me make one thing perfectly clear.
david wrote the living hell out of that episode. he deserved the emmy
nomination (and in my opinion, the emmy itself) for an episode which is
rightfully hailed as a turning point in the series and a signature
moment of "lost."

however, like all episodes of this – and
almost any television show – that story was "broken" in the writers
room. it was discussed, conceived and divided into acts and scenes in
an environment where a group of writers sat together, shared their best
ideas and thoughts, and collectively filtered out the chaff to come up
with the best possible version of that story: which david – to his
complete credit – then turned into one of the best hours of tv that i
have ever seen.

More on Bond

Lkc2SamVariety reports that screen tests are ongoing this week for the new James Bond. The latest front-burner names, as reported here a few days ago, are Daniel Craig and Henry Cavill, with a couple new faces thrown in the mix: ER’s Goran Visnjic and Aussie actor Sam Worthington. The lack of stars in the running (like Clive Owen) is due, Variety reports, to the producers’ unwillingness to pay gross points to their leading man. They want to snag their next 007 for a fraction of the $25 million paid to Pierce Brosnan.

How to Fire Your Agent

Screenwriter Craig Mazin shows you how it’s done.

I recommend doing it on the phone. I don’t say this because it’s the cowardly
move. It’s not. I say this because agents are extremely well-trained in the art
of not letting clients fire them. Don’t kid yourselves…the stories of meetings
that began with clients saying “you’re fired” and ended with “okay, you’re still
my agent” are legend at the big firms, and they have many ways of breaking
you.

As usual, Craig has lots of good advice. Take notes.

Two and out

HEAD CASES was cancelled by Fox after only two episodes, but it’s hardly the first series cancelled so abruptly. It joins an infamous list, compiled by TrivialTV, that includes such forgotten failures as BIG SHAMUS LITTLE SHAMUS, CHARLIE LAWRENCE, FOUR CORNERS,  THE PAULA POUNDSTONE SHOW, PRINCE STREET, SLEEPWALKERS, THE MIKE O’MALLEY SHOW, and RYAN CAULFIELD: YEAR ONE.

What’s it Worth to You to See Me Put on Deordorant?

Idea3Despite it being "an overwhelmingly positive experience," The Waking Vixen is giving up her job as a sex worker:

"Of course, it remains to be seen whether I can maintain “retirement” or whatever
– it’s probably not going to be a clean break. In many ways, sex work is pretty
addictive – the hours, the piles of cash money, the control over my body and
those of others. It’s really difficult to see my days in terms of hour-long
sessions, and to constantly think – hmm, could I get paid for what I’m doing
right now? From peeing to eating to squeezing my nipples, I’m always wondering
about how much that’s worth."

Yeah, me too.  Especially when I’m staring at the blank screen, twisting my nipples, trying to figure out what to write next. Deep down, I think she’s really a writer. I mean, who among us scribes hasn’t had this thought before:

"it’s hard to turn away from it, to think about the eventuality of having to work
with clothes on."