Carl Graves has designed a wonderful new cover for DEAD SPACE (aka BEYOND THE BEYOND). There are new covers coming from him for MY GUN HAS BULLETS and MAN WITH THE IRON-ON BADGE…and I'm real pleased with them, too.
New Cover for Dead Space
Lee Goldberg
Pardon My Interruption
You may have noticed that I haven't been blogging as much lately. The last month or so has been very busy for me. I finished writing a MONK book (MR. MONK ON THE ROAD), wrote an episode (with William Rabkin) of the new A&E series THE GLADES, came up with the story for my next MONK, did a polish of my adaptation of Victor Gischler's GUN MONKEYS for the Big Name Star who is now attached, edited a book of essays by a dozen authors on tie-in writing to be published by the International Association of Media Tie-in Writers, and I prepared for a number of pitches, two of which still may pan out.
On top of that, I wrote an adaptation of one of my favorite western novels (and it looks like the financing for that might be coming through) and have been preparing to write & direct a short film in Kentucky in September based on my short story "Remaindered" (more about that later).
Amidst all of that, there was the post-surgery physical therapy three-times-a-week for my arm (that's finally over).
So blogging has fallen by the wayside and may remain so for a while. But at least I'm not alone… my brother Tod, who used to blog several times a week, hasn't posted anything new since May 23rd.
Tripping Through My Past
Thanks to John Zipperer's blog, I've been able to time-travel into my past through the articles I wrote for STARLOG magazine in the 1980s. John has been cataloging every single issue of STARLOG's run. Each of his blog posts inevitably brings back memories. There are many interviews that I've done that I've forgotten all about, like the one above with screenwriter W.D. Richter on the set of Big Trouble in Little China and one that I did with George Lucas (how could I forget that?). I am also astonished by how hard I worked. I often wrote three or more articles per month. For instnace, in one issue, I had interviews with Kurt Russell, Martin Landau, and director Tobe Hooper..and in another I interviewed Bob Gale, Ray Bradbury, and Kim Cattrall. It's also interesting to see the wide assortment of people I talked to… directors, actors, producers, screenwriters, novelists, special effects experts. But it's clear to me that I was more interested in the writing of the movies and TV shows that I covered than anything else. No surprise there. It's also amusing for me to see how many of my UCLA Daily Bruin buddies (William Rabkin, Brian Lowry, Marc Weinberg), girlfriends (Karen E. Bender), and family members (my mom!) I talked into working for STARLOG, too.
Wiley Royalty Grab
An important warning from The Authors Guild:
Wiley's Deceptive Letter to Bloomberg Press Authors: "We are pleased to inform you" that we will be slicing your royalties up to 50%
John Wiley & Sons acquired Bloomberg Press, the books division of Bloomberg, in March. At the end of April, it began sending a letter to hundreds of Bloomberg Press authors purporting to inform them "about a few differences in the accounting systems of Bloomberg and Wiley that it will be helpful for you to know about."
While this sounds innocent enough, it isn't. If signed by an author, the letter is actually a contract amendment that will materially and adversely affect the royalty rates of many Bloomberg Press authors.
Among other things, this contract amendment would:
1. Change royalty rates based on retail list price to rates based on net receipts. We've reviewed several Bloomberg Press contracts. All provide for royalty payments based on the retail list price (although we understand that there may be many based on net receipts). The Wiley letter misleadingly presents this to the author as good news: "We are pleased to inform you that we will be paying your royalties on the net amount received…" This change will, for many authors, effectively slice royalties by up to 50% for some book sales. Wiley's letter fails to disclose that.
2. Empower Wiley to keep an author's book in print with a lowball print on demand royalty of 5% of net receipts. (Bloomberg Press had no print on demand program.) The contract amendment, which provides no threshold level of sales for a work to be considered in print, essentially grants Wiley a perpetual right in an author's book for a pittance. The 5% of net receipts royalty rate for print on demand editions is as low as we've seen.
We've asked an independent royalty auditor to review the affects of these contractual changes on royalty income. The royalty auditor found reductions of 24% to 43% using actual sales figures and applying Wiley's amendments. (The precise affect of the amendments will vary by title, depending on particular categories of sales of the work.)
The Authors Guild strongly urges Bloomberg Press authors to not sign this letter without careful consideration. If you have received this letter, consult your agent or a publishing attorney or contact a lawyer in our legal department so you understand precisely how this amendment would affect your rights and royalties. Important: if you have already signed the letter and returned it to Wiley, contact our legal department immediately. Non-Guild members are welcome to contact us as well. All communications will, of course, be held in confidence.
This is no way to do business. The letter is shocking from a publisher of Wiley's stature. In our view, Wiley should tear up any signed letters it has received and start over, forthrightly explaining to its new authors the contractual changes it is seeking and how this may affect their income and their right to terminate their publishing contracts.
Read Me a Story
Every author should be lucky enough to hear their story read by a professional actor. It makes you appreciate nuances of character, and feel the "beat" of the story-telling, in ways that sometimes doesn't come across on the page. It's one reason I enjoy listening to the audiobook versions of my MONK books — they feel new to me even though I wrote them.
Tonight I went to WordTheatre's presentation of three short stories: TC Boyle's Three Quarters of the Way to Hell, James Salters' Such Fun, and my brother Tod Goldberg' s Walls. Gary Cole read Walls, Carla Gugino read Such Fun, and Gugino & Adrian Pasdar read Three Quarters of the Way to Hell. Cugino was the stand-out of the three actors, truly enlivening and enriching what she read, particularly in Boyle's story (where she was much stronger than the material she was reading). I am too close to Tod's story to be objective about it, but I thought Cole made some interesting choices, not all of them successful, but he still illuminated aspects of the story that I hadn't seen in the quite same way before, either when I read it or when I'd heard Tod read it.
That's me, Gary Cole, and my brother Tod in the picture (you can click on it for a larger view, though it's hard to imagine me or Tod any larger than we already are). Cole and I chatted about a bit about MIDNIGHT CALLER — he can't understand why the show hasn't come out on DVD yet. I said there's no logic to how those decisions are made… if there was, utter shit like Dom DeLuise's flop sitcom LOTSA LUCK wouldn't be on DVD. Is there anybody who wants to see Dom DeLuise for God's sake?
Naturally, Michael DeLuise was sitting right behind me.
Craptastic Sammy A-Go-Go!
It doesn't get much more craptastic than this — Sammy Davis Jr. sings the theme to "My Mother The Car," one of the worst sitcoms in television history. What the hell was he thinking!?
UPDATE 5/30/2010: YouTube has blocked my clip, so here's another one… and this one is even better. You can actually see Sammy performing the song with dancers on his TV show!
But wait, there's more! Here's Sammy singing the theme to "The Jeffersons"
And, in case you missed'em before, here's Sammy singing the themes to KOJAK, HAWAII FIVE-O, MARY HARTMAN, CHICO AND THE MAN and MARY TYLER MOORE SHOW
Bookwhirl Still Can’t Sell itself
Two years after I trashed Bookwhirl, they've responded. Boy, they move fast. I am obviously dealing with marketing professionals. Here's their no-holds barred response:
Author Lee Goldberg once published an article about BookWhirl.com. He entitled his post, BookWhirl Can't Even Sell Itself. Published last August 2008, the article features Goldberg’s first and only impression about BookWhirl.com.
But contrary to Lee Goldberg’s first impression, we, at BookWhirl.com strive for excellence in the best way that we can to provide assistance to self-published authors. Despite negative reviews, BookWhirl.com continues to sufficiently address and accommodate online marketing needs. With cost-efficient marketing tools, self-published authors are given the chance to efficiently market their books even on a shoestring budget.
Powerfully persuasive stuff. But then again, that's the hallmark of Bookwhirl. And once again, they get to show off their brilliant promotional skills…proudly touting that they "sufficiently address and accommodate" the marketing needs of their clients. Wow, that's mighty impressive. It's not easy finding a publicist who is sufficient, is it? They also go on to showcase their exceptional grasp of English and grammar, too:
BookWhirl.com is continuously improving and ironing the quality of its business communications. BookWhirl.com is grateful to its consumers who have extended their commendation on the improvement of our customer communications.
Back in September 2009, despite my negative blog post about them, the sufficient publicists at Bookwhirl contacted me again with a sales pitch:
Hi Lee,
A pleasant day to you.
This is Melissa Adams, a Marketing Consultant of Bookwhirl.com.
I came across your book, “Mr. Monk is Miserable” and I find it very interesting. Our company, Bookwhirl.com is really interested to help you in promoting your book/s online because we find out that your book/s deserves to be recognized.
As a Marketing Consultant, what I can do is to offer you a strategic marketing optimization that will help you strengthen the marketing punch of your book/s and eventually in the future this will help increase your book sales, and at the same time, increase the popularity of your book/s since we can send this out to thousands or even millions of people which are your target potential buyers.
The right time for you and your books in achieving the attention and recognition that is so rightfully deserved has come. You have the book, we have the Marketing Tools.
Please let me know the best way to contact you. You may also simply reply to this email or call at my toll free number X XXX XXX-XXXX. I’d be grateful to give you more information about this.
Please visit our website at www.Bookwhirl.com for more information.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Melissa Adams
Consultant
Marketing Services – BookWhirl.com
Toll Free: 1 (877) 207-1679 ext 323
Fax No. : 1 (800) 852-4249
Email : madams@bookwhirl.com
Info@Bookwhirl.com
www.Bookwhirl.com
I replied:
You can't even write a coherent paragraph, with proper verb/tense agreement, and you think you can promote my books?
They contacted me again a month later with yet another pitch. I saved that message, too.
Hi Lee Goldberg,
A pleasant day.
I’m Rabbie Allen, a Marketing Specialist of Bookwhirl.com www.bookwhirl.com
I came across your book entitled, “.357 VIGILANTE: DIE, MR. JURY”. We are interested to promote it and we’d like to help you reach out up to 5,000,000 individuals and let them know about you and your passion for your work.
If you are interested, please provide me the best way to contact you or you may give me a call at XXX-XXX-XXXX or you may simply reply to this email. I’d be grateful to give you more information about this.
Hope to hear from you soon.
Rabbie Allen
Consultant
Marketing Services – BookWhirl.com
Toll Free: 1 (877) 207-1679 ext 318
Fax No. : 1 (800) 852-4249
Email : rallen@bookwhirl.com
Info@Bookwhirl.com
www.Bookwhirl.com
I replied:
Here's a free piece of advice from a professional writer: don't start trying to sell yourself as an expert in promotion until you've mastered basic English. You already have a reputation as know-nothing con artists…now you are becoming known as fools.
They clearly did not take my advice.
CSI Goldberg returns
I had a great time at the Forensic Trends conference, though, to be honest, I only attended the talk that I gave. Before I began my presentation, I made a quick visit to the Hilton men's room…which may be good for relieving your bladder but, as the photo illustrates, won't do much to bolster your self-confidence before you speak to a few hundred people (you can CLICK on the photo for a larger view, no pun intended).
After the conference, I had a very nice dinner with Jim Clemente, a former FBI profiler turned TV producer & consultant (CRIMINAL MINDS, THE CLOSER, etc.). He' s a fascinating guy and a very talented story-teller. I actually met him for the first time two years ago at a forensics conference I spoke at in Pittsburgh. Meeting people like Jim is one of the big reasons why I agree to all these speaking engagements and teaching opportunities….you never know who you will meet or what might come from those relationships.
I was stunned by how much Las Vegas has changed since I visited three years ago. The skyline is radically different…and yes,I know that's a cliche observation, but it's true nonetheless.
Le Notre bakery is no longer at Paris Las Vegas… c'est triste. I loved that place.
Caesars Palace has had more facelifts than a Malibu trophy wife, but the latest one is very nice. The Forum Shops is still the best looking shopping mall in America, but the shops at the Venetian are a close second.
The Aladdin is now a Planet Hollywood resort. I visited the former Aladdin Shops, which were once like the Forum Shops but now they are renovating out the character so it will look like any other shopping mall. I went into an ABC convenience store and was surprised to see Extenze and Top Gun, both advertised as a "fast acting male enhancement that can make you larger," on sale beside the Rolaids & Tums & M&Ms. Only in Vegas.
I also visited some of the new hotels — Palazzo is spectacular, Wynn/Encore are gaudy and garish riffs on the Belagio decor, Aria is super sleek and contemporary, and the face-lift at the Mirage is very nice, downplaying the dated gaudiness Wynn seems to revel in nowadays.
The conference was held at the Hilton, which is a decaying dump…not quite as bad as The Riviera, but heading in that same direction. The rooms aren't bad, decor-wise, but the walls are so thin you can hear the people in the adjoining rooms making love, farting, talking on the phone, etc..and if you manage to finally get to sleep, the talking and bitching of the maids and workmen in the hallway will wake you up before 8 am.
The Hilton pool is no better than what you might find at off-the-highway motel…and the music that blared from the out-door speakers was so loud and distorted that you couldn't hear yourself think, much less read a book. The Star Trek Experience is gone, but not the corner of the casino that's decked out in a science fiction theme. It now serves as a portal to the Vegas Monorail. The Hilton certainly is not the classy, elegant place James Bond stayed at it in Diamonds are Forever anymore…and probably hasn't been for twenty-some years.
CSI Goldberg
Today I am off to speak at the third annual Forensic Trends: Psychiatric & Behavioral Issues Conference in Las Vegas. The conference is supposed to tackle "current advances in forensic research and theory with subsequent translation into assessment strategies and interventions […]to produce the best possible legal and therapeutic outcomes for those encountering the medicolegal system." I think they invited me to speak by mistake. But I am looking forward to it… I had a great time faking my way through a similar conference in Pittsburgh two years ago. The topic of my presentation is How Fictional Detectives Solve Crimes, which they've billed as "a humorous, inside look at how authors and screenwriters craft their mysteries, bend the rules of science, and abuse their forensic and medical technical advisors to create entertaining crime novels and TV shows." It's a four hour drive from L.A. to Las Vegas, so I'm hoping that will give me time to figure out what I am going to say.
But this is also doubling as a research trip, since a chunk of my next book, MR. MONK ON THE ROAD, takes place in Las Vegas and journey there. So au revoir, a bientot, see you back here soon.
You Can Become a Kindle Millionaire, Part 18
On April 17, I predicted in a post on this blog that I'd earn $1400 in Kindle royalties this month. I was right. I earned $1416. It was, by far, my best Kindle month since I began this experiment eleven months ago. Last month, I sold 1360 books…this month I sold 1798, an increase of 438 books and $400 in royalties. (Click on my royalty statement for a larger view).
I credit the surge this month to three things:
1. my bet with Joe Konrath, which resulted in new covers and titles for my Vigilante novels. It was a bet I was thrilled to lose.
2. raising the price of THREE WAYS TO DIE from .99 cents to 1.99.
3. adding a Kindle edition of my out-0f-print book THE MAN WITH THE IRON-ON BADGE to my available titles.
Sales of the VIGILANTE books (now known, thanks to Joe, as The Jury Series) shot up enormously. For example, the previously titled .357 VIGILANTE #4: KILLSTORM sold 14 copies last month. This month, by rebranding the book GUILTY, I sold 125 copies. I now have someone re-reading the manuscripts of all four books, correcting the conversion errors that have bedeviled me since I posted them a few months ago.
Last month, THREE WAYS TO DIE sold 201 priced at 99 cents and earned $70. This month, I sold 169 and earned $103. Fewer sales, but higher royalties. I can live with that.
.
THE MAN WITH THE IRON-ON BADGE, priced at $2.99, quickly became my second best-selling title, if not in volume (234 copies sold) certainly in profits ($245). Those sales reassure me that my bestselling title, THE WALK, will do fine when, in late June, I raise the price from $1.99 to $2.99 to take advantage of Amazon's new royalty formula, which will give me a 70% royalty instead of the 35% I get now.
By the way, this month THE WALK sold 629 copies, earning me $440 (last month I sold 575 copies). A new high.
Changing the cover and title of BEYOND THE BEYOND boosted sales a bit. Last month, under the BEYOND title, I sold 73 copies. This month, rebranded as DEAD SPACE, I sold 92.
I can't wait to see how things shake out in July once my royalty doubles. Will my earning, if not my volume of sales, go up? Or will it level off? Or will the bubble burst and sales slowly begin to deteriorate? I don't know, but no matter what happens, I am already a winner. As I keep saying, this is all found money on out-of-print books that were packed away in my garage or in a dark corner of my hard-drive.