Lee Goldberg

The Invisible Character

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Helfer2On NIP/TUCK last week, one of the characters had a long conversation at a bar with someone who wasn’t there — an old lover who ran off to France. But as I was watching the scene, I realized what seemed like a novel notion just a few years ago — characters talking to full-bodied ghosts/figments of their imagination — has rapidly become a cliche. Now the technique is being used everywhere you look on TV and in every genre you can think of.  SIX FEET UNDER, NIP/TUCK, BATTLESTAR GALACTICA, GHOST WHISPERER, LOST, MEDIUM,
MISSING, and MONK are just some of the shows that regularly employ the "talking to people who aren’t there" gimmick. I don’t know for sure where it started (SIX FEET UNDER?) but it’s become a staple now of dramatic television. And it’s stupid. Think about it  — when was the last time you, or anybody you know who isn’t institutionalized, believed they were seeing and talking to someone who, actually, wasn’t there?

(Oh, and a caveat — this rant is coming from someone who has used the gimmick once or twice himself).

The Long Journey to Publication

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I got this comment here yesterday regarding my new book THE MAN WITH THE IRON-ON BADGE:

I noticed in the comments on Paul’s site that it two years of wading
through rejections and the like, to the point you wondered that it may
just sit in your drawyer for all of time – I would be most interested
to hear more about this journey from you, what your thoughts were on
why it didn’t find a home in the beginning, what obstacles you faced
with it, etc. I think many have the idea that established, published
writers don’t have to deal with that once they’ve broken in and gotten
published.

Succeeding with a book or two doesn’t  mean everything you write from now on will get published.  The publishing business today is brutal. There are many well-known authors who wrote a book outside their established series or genre and, as a result, either had to fight to get it published, had to switch publishers for the title, or couldn’t get it published at all. And there are many acclaimed, mid-list authors who have had their long-running, successful series dropped and are fighting to get back in print again (often having to resort to using a pseudonym to avoid being damned by sales figures of their last few books).

THE MAN WITH THE IRON-ON BADGE is about a guy who learns everything he knows about being a PI from reading books and watching TV shows. It’s about the clash between fictional expectations/stereotypes and reality. The book is something of a spoof…and yet, at the same time, a straight-ahead crime novel full of explicit sex and violence. That shifting tone made the book a hard sell…because it didn’t fit into a particular marketing niche. Is it a satire? Is it a PI novel? Is it a thriller?

Most of  the editors who rejected the book praised the writing but didn’t see where it would fit in their publishing line.  There were two editors at major houses who loved it and wanted to acquire it…but  couldn’t convince their superiors. Another wrote a LONG rejection letter, saying how much she loved it, that it was the best PI novel she’d read, and how it pained her not to be able to publish it. (In the mean time, I wrote a screenplay version of the book, which landed me the gig writing the DAME EDNA movie. It never got made, but it was a very big payday for me and my first solo screenwriting job outside of episodes of TV shows I’ve produced).

It was frustrating not being able to sell the book because I felt it was the best novel I’ve ever written. I loved writing it and I very much wanted to write more about Harvey Mapes, the main character. At the same time, I couldn’t whine too much, because I have been doing well with the DIAGNOSIS MURDER books. Of course I approached my DM editors about BADGE…but as much as they like me, and my work, they weren’t willing to take the gamble (I’m hoping they will consider the paperback rights now that the book has been so well reviewed).

Finally, after two years of  shopping the book, we took it to Thomson/Gale/Five Star,  which has  a reputation for putting out fine mysteries…and for being a place  where  published authors can find a home for their "dropped" series and unpublished works.   It’s an imprint run by writers (like founder Ed Gorman) and editors (like legendary book packager Martin Greenberg)  who truly love books and appreciate authors. They produce handsome hard-covers that are respected and reviewed by the major industry publications. I had a great experience with them on THE WALK (another book that was a hard sell)  and I knew they would treat THE MAN WITH THE IRON-ON BADGE well.

The downsides with Five Star are that they pay a  low advance, they primarily serve the library market and have very limited distribution to bookstores (though they are stocked in most independant mystery bookstores). The only way to get your title in a Barnes & Noble or Borders is to have an event in one of their stores.  Still, it’s possible to win wide acclaim and impressive sales with a Five Star title, as my friend Robert Levinson proved last year with ASK A DEAD MAN, an LA Times Bestseller that won a starred Publishers Weekly review.

The hope with a Five Star title is that it will be well-reviewed, sell big within Five Star’s limited market, perhaps get an Edgar nod (or the equivalent from RWA, WWA, etc), and get enough notice that a larger house will pick-up the mass market paperback or foreign rights.

Success can open a lot of doors, and make the experience smoother, but unless you’re at the Stephen King/Janet Evanovich/Michael Connelly level, it by no means guarantees a free ride.

The Flash in the Pan

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Flash_completeYet another flop TV series I didn’t write or produce is being released on DVD. All 22 episodes of the one-season bomb THE FLASH are coming to DVD in a boxed set.

Not that this is related to THE FLASH…but since I’m talking about TV shows on DVD today, I thought I’d mention that  Universal is finally releasing SEAQUEST on DVD. The complete first season, starring Roy Scheider before his face lift,  is being released in December. I’m looking forward to the release of the 13 episodes from Season 3, when the show was retitled SEAQUEST 2032 and starred Michael Ironside (that was the season I worked on).

Today is Pub Day

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1594143722_1Prepare yourself for same blatant self-promotion…but I think I’m allowed.

Today is the official publication date of THE MAN WITH THE IRON-ON BADGE, which should start appearing in finer mystery bookstores nationwide, like Mystery Book Store, Mysteries to Die For, and Murder By The Book. You can also order if from Amazon. Here are some excerpts from the pre-publication reviews:

"As dark and twisted as anything as anything Hammett or Chandler ever dreamed
up…leaving Travis McGee in the dust" Kirkus Reviews Starred Review

"Approaching the level of Lawrence Block is no mean feat, but Goldberg (the
Diagnosis Murder series) succeeds with this engaging PI novel…" Publishers Weekly

"A
convincing, even moving tale about the real nature of the SoCal streets and
the real nature of heroism," Ed Gorman

"Likeable loser Harvey Mapes is my new favorite private eye, the guy with the dead-end job who longs to be Mannix or Travis McGee.  I hope the folks in charge of the Shamus nominations are paying attention." Victor Gischler

"Violent, often crude, sometimes hilarious and ultimately touching, this book is
a great homage to the Gold Medal paperbacks of the 1950s and 1960s." Clair Lamb, Mystery Bookstore newsletter

A witty, wicked and dare I say wise little book. Lee Goldberg shows off more than just his funny bone here. He reveals a keen eye for the wrenching heartbreaks and triumphs that forge heroes" David Corbett

"Lee Goldberg’s ‘The Man in the Iron-On Badge’ is a very funny book about the ironclad LA class system, life in a security guard’s shack, and the crucial differences between violence as
experienced on a TV show and in real life. " Scott
Phillips

"A quick fun read with a satisfying and unexpected ending. Harvey Mapes is a hero I  hope we see in a sequel." Phillip
Margolin

"A clever, witty and intelligent parody of, and homage to, the PI genre." Robert
Randisi

"Lee Goldberg is a sly and funny writer, with a warm heart and an ease with words. 
He never disappoints." SJ Rozan

"This book starts out as a fine example of the humorous “lovable schmoe”
school of detective fiction, and Goldberg does a good job with that part of it, but then it takes a sudden turn into darker and more dangerous territory and becomes even better…"James Reasoner

"The book is about Harvey’s discovery that real-life crime isn’t like
the fictional variety at all. At first, the differences are played for
laughs, but when Harvey’s case takes a tragic turn, Lee never loses his
footing. Harvey actually matures on the page, a transformation made
evident in the character’s distinctive voice." Vince Keenan

"Goldberg is funny in this rip on pop culture, PI cliches, and
California culture…a laugh-out-loud example of what the best PI
novels should be."  James Winter, Reflections in a Private Eye

A History Of Violence

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I’ve never been a big David Cronenberg fan, but I liked A HISTORY OF VIOLENCE, though it could have been so much better. It’s a shame the mobsters were played, costumed and directed,  so cartoonishly over-the-top…had they been as realistic and controlled as the rest of the characters (and performances), this movie really could have soared.

There was a reason FIREFLY was cancelled after eight episodes…

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I saw SERENITY last night.

I know I’m in the minority here, but I thought it was a loud, boring, uninspired mess…that played like what it was: a hyped up episode of a not-very-interesting TV series. Even so, the movie wasn’t nearly as well-written, well-acted, or exciting as a typical episode of the new BATTLESTAR GALACTICA (proving, once again, that what’s on TV these days is better that what’s in the theaters). It had a real TV pilot feel… despite an entire universe to play with, the action was mostly limited to four soundstage sets that looked like soundstage sets.

The cast, with the exception of the captain (Nathan Fillian) and the bad guy (Chiwetel Ejiofor), have no discernible range and no chemistry with one another.  The characters themselves are one-dimensional cut-outs that only a true fan of the short-lived series could care about.

The special effects had a cheesy, computer-game feel…as did the story  (the bad guys, the flesh-eating RESIDENT EVIL-esque zombies, are just so much target practice…and blandly reminiscent of the cannibal aliens on STARGATE ATLANTIS).

The action set pieces and the plot seemed cobbled together from STAR TREK episodes, old westerns, and Hong Kong movies and I got tired of the constant  "take-a-cliche-line-from-another-movie- and-add-a-petulant-whine-to-it" style of dialogue ("Do you want to be Captain of this ship?" "Yeah, I do." "Well, uh, you can’t.")… when they weren’t using phrases from old westerns or speaking Chinese. 

I really wanted to like this movie but came away disappointed.

Can HELLO LARRY Be Far Behind?

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Lotsaluck_completeseriesAfter years of letter-writing, praying and dreaming… the long wait is finally over. All 22 episodes of the 1973 flop sitcom LOTSA LUCK, starring Dom DeLuise, are coming out on DVD.

And if you’re one of the tens of thousands of people who’ve been pining for the DVD release of the 1967 flop sitcom GOOD MORNING WORLD, the complete series of 26 episodes starring Ronnie Schell is  also headed to a Best Buy near you. While you’re there, don’t forget to pick up the complete series sets of THE JOEY BISHOP SHOW,  FAR OUT SPACE NUTS, THAT’S MY MAMA, NED AND STACY, TABITHA and PINK LADY AND JEFF.

The End of Sex

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Deniserichards1That got your attention, didn’t it? UPN has shut down production on the Denise Richards series  SEX LOVE AND SECRETS after only one airing and with just eight of the show’s 13 episodes shot. Daily Variety reports that the network will air the seven remaining episodes  and then re-evaluate the show’s future (yeah, right). Barring a miraculous, sudden surge in ratings, the show is dead.  NBC’s fertility clinic drama  INCONCEIVABLE and FOX’s police procedural KILLER INSTINCT may be the next shows smothered in their sleep.

With ""Inconceivable"
going nowhere at 10 (prelim 1.5/5 in 18-49, 4.6 million), and Fox, with "Killer
Instinct" a distant fourth at 9 (prelim 1.5/5, 4.6 million), were well behind
CBS with a 1.6 average in 18-49. Both almost certainly will make sked
changes before November sweeps.

Meanwhile, Bob Saget is returning to television…no, not in yet another season of AMERICA’S FUNNIEST HOME VIDEOS, but as the star, producer and co-writer of EDDIE’S FATHER,  which Variety described as an "R-rated version of ‘The Courtship of Eddie’s Father.’"

Saget will play a divorced dad who works as a gynecologist in Phoenix. Show will
focus on the character as he balances raising a 14-year-old son while trying to
lead as active a social life as possible.

"The show is my son and I going through adolescence at the same time," Saget
explained. "What makes it exciting is that because I’m working with HBO, I’ll
get to use the same language in the show that I use with my own kids, which is
just very honest and real."